Andy Hobsbawm

New name for the Gunners: “VARsenal” I just made that up - you’re welcome.

Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees. $30 per seat per month. $1.4 million annually. I called it "digital transformation." The board loved that phrase. They approved it in eleven minutes. No one asked what it would actually do. Including me. I told everyone it would "10x productivity." That's not a real number. But it sounds like one. HR asked how we'd measure the 10x. I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards." They stopped asking. Three months later I checked the usage reports. 47 people had opened it. 12 had used it more than once. One of them was me. I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds. It took 45 seconds. Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations. But I called it a "pilot success." Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail. The CFO asked about ROI. I showed him a graph. The graph went up and to the right. It measured "AI enablement." I made that metric up. He nodded approvingly. We're "AI-enabled" now. I don't know what that means. But it's in our investor deck. A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT. I said we needed "enterprise-grade security." He asked what that meant. I said "compliance." He asked which compliance. I said "all of them." He looked skeptical. I scheduled him for a "career development conversation." He stopped asking questions. Microsoft sent a case study team. They wanted to feature us as a success story. I told them we "saved 40,000 hours." I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up. They didn't verify it. They never do. Now we're on Microsoft's website. "Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot." The CEO shared it on LinkedIn. He got 3,000 likes. He's never used Copilot. None of the executives have. We have an exemption. "Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction." I wrote that policy. The licenses renew next month. I'm requesting an expansion. 5,000 more seats. We haven't used the first 4,000. But this time we'll "drive adoption." Adoption means mandatory training. Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches. But completion will be tracked. Completion is a metric. Metrics go in dashboards. Dashboards go in board presentations. Board presentations get me promoted. I'll be SVP by Q3. I still don't know what Copilot does. But I know what it's for. It's for showing we're "investing in AI." Investment means spending. Spending means commitment. Commitment means we're serious about the future. The future is whatever I say it is. As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

@NigelStonier I agree, but also... Labour FFS, do better! Anti-fraud minister resigned - fraud allegations... Homelessness Minister resigned - housing issue...Secretary of State for Housing resigned - housing tax issue, etc. We NEED this gov to succeed or Reform will win the next election!

I usually avoid political debate on here but today's different #AngelaRayner made a bad slip, but was hounded by a rightwing press whose billionaire owners habitually dodge vast amounts of tax and ignore far more harmful acts by politicians they support. She deserved better

One of the most interesting things I’ve read about ageing, specifically for men - doesn’t pull any punches and a lovely quote about how it feels to grow older by American poet George Oppen: “What a strange thing to happen to a little boy.” ian-leslie.com/p/27-notes-on-…

Encouraging to see that steady compounding means clean energy is on track to decarbonise the economy. BUT it’s too slow - we need 2-3x the speed! (Via @ExponentialView)

@Hubbsy85 @Flav_Bateman It's the only way. (There's still the Europa League...but it's the hope that kills you).

@AndyHobs @Flav_Bateman Had to have a conversation with myself and then decided I had to do the same to my lad as my dad did to me and grandad did to my dad. As gutting as it is for the little man to never watch us achieve anything, the family bonds over the constant failure of Tottenham. 🤣

The #Spurs chain of pain. @Flav_Bateman sums up the legacy of misery bequeathed to generations of #Tottenham supporters.⚽️

This is obv how #SkyNet starts

🎶 Looking forward to being back at @CabbagePatchPub this 𝗧𝗵𝘂𝗿 𝟲𝘁𝗵 𝗠𝗮𝗿 raising money for the wonderful @RefugeCharity as part of #internationalwomensday 2025 💪

“Lads, it’s United.” 😂 #COYS

@NigelStonier Congratulations! 🎉

NEWS!! So happy to announce I've signed a new deal with APM Records New single "That's Why God Made Tribute Bands" drops March 7 New album "Wolf Notes" drops May 2 My 1st new music in 6 yrs.. I can't wait for you to hear it ❤️ Here I am with APM mainman Mark Stratford

In England we call this club Tottenham Hotspur FC ! #THFC

🙏 A quick roundup of 2024. Thanks to everyone that came to a show or listened to my music. HNY 2025 to all! ❤️ 🎉 #HappyNewYear2025 #HNY2025 #Americanamusic

🎙️ Looking forward to playing at @cabbagepatchpub next 𝗦𝗮𝘁 𝟯𝟬𝘁𝗵 𝗡𝗼𝘃 at the slightly later time of 𝟱𝗽𝗺 for The Taste of Twickenham 2-day Christmas Fair! 🎄

@austindimmer Same, done!

#TEDAI #Vienna main conf about to start…

Introducing, Act-One. A new way to generate expressive character performances inside Gen-3 Alpha using a single driving video and character image. No motion capture or rigging required. Learn more about Act-One below. (1/7)

Can’t help feeling the solemn gothic architecture of St. Stephen’s cathedral in Vienna is somewhat undermined by the massive bitcoin poster. Perhaps the church is moving to blockchain-based Proof-of-Faith? 🤔

I just invented a new word “ideal-breaker”. (noun): Event, trait, or circumstance that disrupts or contradicts one’s vision of an ultimate standard, rendering an otherwise perfect situation unsatisfactory. EG: “His unwillingness to compromise on the design was an ideal-breaker.”

❤️ “Ladies Night” at the Sir Richard Steele earlier this month playing with @savgardnermusic and @EmilyMoment was super fun and had a lovely vibe. 🥰 #livemusic #womeninmusic #acoustic