Things Overheard at Fort Kickass

izzit bomb or vom?

one day the men behind the curtain will be fed to the pigs - and in their absence the earth will begin to recover

buckle down or buckle up

dipshiðiot

much rather have a bleeding heart and a leaky wallet than a full wallet and no heart

guttural gunshots

I should clarify but alas I shant

a little history, chronic conditions, context, and a spray-on a solo star-ski joyride near Venus

father - I hope the afterlife is real - cuz when I get there I'm gonna kick your ass - mother - I hope the afterlife isn't real - so you never have to deal with that asshole again - but if it is - tell him I'm on my way to kick his ass

I hear tell that non-shy people exist

if eyes could eat I'd be covered in crumbs rn

sometimes the *real* siblings were the friends we banged along the way

pirate heuristics

the price of my compliance is One Hot Air Balloon

worry stems from fear stems from trauma and a perceived lack of control embrace that we know nothing about the future and walk backwards into new things

weed zamboni

I am the food witch

the irony of telling a Tree to go to therapy is not lost on me

we transed our gender TWICE

kimchi. tuna. wrap.