Chris B. Martin

#PastriesGonePostal Little Deadly Nutty Bloody

Hostel Cupcake #PastriesGonePostal

@WeeklyHumorist Hostel Cupcake

@WeeklyHumorist Bear-Claws-Your-Tongue-Out

This. movie. sucked. #svengoolie

I don't have time for jokes either. That's why I can always rely on MeTv. #svengoolie

FUN FACT: Ron Howard used that same crappy chemistry set to come up with the film adaptation of 'Hillbilly Elegy'. #svengoolie

@Joe_A_Blevins Thanks for the nightmare fuel.

Hmmmm. I see a connection. #svengoolie

As a promotional gimmick, theater audiences should have been give rocks and slings while watching the film. It would have saved work for the critics. #svengoolie

So it's up to Tommy Kirk's character to save the day. We're soooo dead. #svengoolie

Mike: Ever heard of David and Goliath? Horsey: Oh, yeah. That Claymation kid and his dog who taught Christian values. #svengoolie

Wait. Did Svengoolie really say the word "gay" on MeTv? We could be dealing with an alien impostor. #svengoolie

I suppose there could worse candidates for a Village Of Giants. But the music might be better. #svengoolie

Beau Bridges didn't think about his future when he took this gig. Where is he going to find a hundred foot long piano and a thirty foot tall Michelle Pfeiffer? #svengoolie

Meanwhile, Bert I. Gordon dances The Classic Literature Stomp. #svengoolie

Apparently, this town never heard of telephones or telegraphs. #svengoolie

Of course, they could have sliced off a sample of the goop and fled town to have analyzed. Then, we wouldn't have a movie. #svengoolie

'Pa never told me how to handle giant boobs' #svengoolie

If Bert I. Gordon put an eye out filming the giant kids gyrating, it would be worth it. #svengoolie

The good teens desperately need a talking great dane to boost their IQ level. #svengoolie