Drunken Baby

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Drunken Baby

Drunken Baby

@BabyHangover

I shit you not, the airplane was heading straight for my mouth...

In My Crib Katılım Kasım 2012
5.9K Takip Edilen5.9K Takipçiler
Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
The bitch wouldn't let me suck her tits so I pissed on her when she was changing my diaper
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
I'm shy at first, but once I'm comfortable with you, get ready for some crazy shit.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
F%CK!!! Just flipped my tricycle...Don't drink and ride.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
How did Dexter's parents NOT know about his secret Lab? That electric bill had to be higher than Wiz Khalifa!
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
Dinosaurs are lies told to us to cover up the existence of Pokemon.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
Rub a dub dub. Took a shit in the tub.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
Say I says, I says, Sorry, I don't speak cuntanese.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
I swear, this fucker would say "Peekaboo!", then just disappear!
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
Two types of people that annoy me: Drunk people when I m sober. Sober people when I m drunk.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
Volleyball = A more intense version of don't let the balloon hit the floor.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
So I look around and the daycare and the place is literally crawling with chicks.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
So then she sticks the thermometer up there! I'm telling you, this girl was a freak.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
That gangsta feeling when you rap your favorite song without messing up.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
For all of those that think alcohol is a problem... according to Chemistry: Alcohol is a solution. Thanks science!
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
Fuck people who lock their Wi-Fi.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
So I was sucking on her tits then her husband walks in and I just shit myself.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
As a boyfriend, you shouldn't allow NOBODY to disrespect your girl & if you okay with that, YOU AINT SHIT.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
Congrats on being one of the "cool kids" in school. Too bad about the rest of your life though.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
Listen, I'm not an alcoholic, alcoholics go to meetings. I'm a drunk, we go to parties.
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Drunken Baby
Drunken Baby@BabyHangover·
Okay, but just one more beer. I have to be up at 3 a.m. tomorrow to wake my parents up.
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