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Will Schreiner
8.1K posts
Will Schreiner
@Beeshrine
Pittsburgh Comedian and Video Connoisseur. Technically a paid professional. Still waiting for Vine to come back.
Pittsburgh, PA Katılım Eylül 2015
1.5K Takip Edilen2.3K Takipçiler
@itssarahdutcher You should see how spooked he gets when he hears the phrase “cancel culture”
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Jesus actually drives a Christler.
Will Schreiner@Beeshrine
“Jesus take the wheel”??? The man never even had a learner’s permit.
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“Jesus take the wheel”???
The man never even had a learner’s permit.
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The problem with me and my gf both using birth control is that we aren’t sure who’s IUD is doing the heavy lifting
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@itssarahdutcher It was a better title than “edgelords rating edgelords”, so I’ll give them that
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hellah? hellah?? what the fuck is hellah? why would they be an extra H at the end? does that change the pronunciation?
D E J A 🧚🏽♀️@dejalove57
Everybody wanna read books now 😂😭 like this generation just copy catters bro 😑 i swear I been seeing Hellah people go to the library and posting books lately
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russell brand is by far the most embarrassing person i’ve slept with, which is saying a lot cause i’ve also slept with someone that hosted a witcher role playing table top game podcast.
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@itssarahdutcher I’m getting ratio’d for trying to be a caring father
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bf: wanna hear work drama?
me, unemployed, desperate: yes!
bf: i’m keeping the baby spiders in a lamp secret
me: i liked your work gossip better when your coworker got a restraining order for beating up her ex’s car with her stilettos
Will Schreiner@Beeshrine
Girlfriend was not as excited as I had hoped to find out I have been keeping a spider nest in my office secret from my coworkers so I can watch the babies grow up
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Girlfriend was not as excited as I had hoped to find out I have been keeping a spider nest in my office secret from my coworkers so I can watch the babies grow up
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String theory is when my cats see a string and hypothesizes that he can swallow it without throwing it back up (he can’t)
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I’m not a touring comedian but i’ll put on a hell of a performance if you come to me
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People would have the exact opposite reaction if they found out Tim Walz fucked the bisexual couch
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@itssarahdutcher @twaniimals Any cat can pretend to be this chill for treats
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@twaniimals @Beeshrine which of our cats would this work for? fatima has never been chill in her life, jax is a business man and would never pose like this, so i think it has to be onyx??
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@gingeralesauce I have no idea what she’s saying it’s like a different language to me
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Chapell Roan has a gay little chokehold on my gf and I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to win her back
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@DirtyDiceGoblin I promised I would never do that again. It was too powerful
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