Brandon

@skullmandible happy birthday, bozo!

@ideaot the red bird literally said "whatever, YOLO." and now I'm screaming

@ideaot just a trailer? sounds like a tease to me

@LostCatDog smame

#UFC159 Is this the one where they finally kiss?

Zach Braff's middle name is Israel & American's LOVE to give money to *a giant cane yanks me out of the universe*

These are all phrases I'm hearing in this meeting I'm in and I want to DIE

*creates shareable content*

*Increases linkability*

*optimizes social media presence*

@france_xiii Thanks, buddy!

@Jonny_Wags that's awesome. Travel safe, mr wags

returning to the casino tonight after my 10 year ban for using D&D dice to win at craps

how do I join pretentious blowhard twitter?

@dinogore jesus. what a fucking turd

@MrPhetz I'm going to the pechanga tonight. You should come, so I can throw you on the craps table.

@dinogore oh, I get it. He promised to get a tattoo...etc. I hope he gets fired and has to coach Grambling St.

@dinogore what is happening in this picture?

@thetwentysixtwo he looks like he should be gnawing on some cheese

@initfo i agree