Shadow bryant

@Dazzlelizz Distracting me from my duty as a diver is undemocratic. Stay focused men, we must push back the illuminate scum.

It would be... undemocratic if you don't fill this out

Expedition 33

GOKU?!

There was a businessman whose wife was REALLY into sex... He was a hardworking guy, and he still managed to satisfy his wife's needs. One time, he had to leave for another country for a business meeting. He would be gone for a week. He knew his wife's sex drive and didn't want to take risks, so he thought he should gift her something so she could satisfy herself and didn't think about searching for a new partner, so he went to an adult toy shop. As soon as he entered, the first thing he saw was a blow-up doll, but he soon dismissed the thought of buying it since it was almost like another human. He then proceeded to the dildos section. There he saw all kinds of dildos, from massive to tiny to ones which glow in the dark, but none of them grabbed his interest, so he decided he would go somewhere else and began to leave the shop when he was stopped by the owner sitting behind the cash counter. "I know what you're looking for", the owner says This grabbed the businessman's attention, and he stopped to hear what the owner had to say. "There was a man many years ago who looked just like you, wealthy but tired. He had a wife whom he couldn't satisfy, and she was about to leave him when he came here and got my help. He's happily married since then" "How exactly did you help him?" asked the businessman. The cashier bent down and revealed an engraved wooden box from under the counter. There were all sorts of symbols on the box. He opened it, and inside it was a pink latex dildo, similar to the ones on the shelf. "This is an ancient artefact haunted by a Maori tribe who all died of sex deprivation when all the women of their village were killed in a plague, all their souls now reside in this dildo", said the owner. The businessman, being a sceptical guy, laughed and then turned to leave. The owner says, "You're all the same, thinking there's nothing above this material plane of existence. Watch this." The businessman turns around. "Voodoo Dildo, keyhole" To his astonishment, the businessman saw the box violently shake and the dildo rise in the air, float for a second and hover over to the keyhole in the front door and start to shag it. The dildo shagged the keyhole with such force that the door unhinged and started cracking. "Voodoo Dildo, box" The dildo stops shagging the door and returns to the box. "ILL TAKE IT, cried the businessman, and after a lot of negotiation, he finally purchased the dildo and ran home. He tells his wife about the dildo and how to use it. "Voodoo Dildo, pussy. That's how you activate it", the businessman told his wife and went on his business trip. After 3 days of being horny, the wife finally gave in to her urges and opened the wooden box, took out the dildo and uttered "Voodoo Dildo, pussy". The dildo shot from her hands and started shagging her. First slowly and then changing speed as the way she wanted. After an hour of shagging, the wife thought it was enough, and she grabbed the dildo to turn it off. But it didn't stop shagging her. Her husband had forgotten to tell her how to stop the dildo. She started panicking and called him, but he didn't pick up, so she started to dress up and go to the hospital, all the while the dildo was still shagging her. She got in her car and started driving. On the way, she had a huge orgasm, and her car swerved and almost hit another car. A cop saw this, and she was stopped at the side of the highway. A cop approached her. "Ma'am, you almost hit the grey SUV back there. Have you been drinking?" The wife then proceeds to tell him all about her husband and the voodoo Dildo and that she can't stop it now. The policeman then says, "Yeah, right, Voodoo Dildo my ass."

hey baba! 🖤

"oh hey its that one guy from the digital circus" "She

UI glitched during a comp match and the POTG looked like this

@fairyprxncess Someone clearly too good for me

who could pull this off?

Magic *snort* *snort*

ストレッチ中に出す猫の音

No one laughs at your jokes like a hyena [📹 animalwhispers88]

( #jsab #JustShapesAndBeats x #ULTRAKILL !!) I think I ended up in the wrong area .. #animation

SOMEONE HELP ME!!! I CAME FOR CHUCK NORRIS, BUT HE INFORMED ME HE ACTUALLY CAME FOR ME

@McNasty Twitter. Why u give me this post at 5:20 am. What the fuck twitter

im crappin shits you've never even heard of. your ass cant even contemplate the level at which my butt poops. out here droppin sludge like a shrek sneeze. layin logs a lumberjack dreams of. passin choco chunks that'll make count chocula cream his jorts. step back rookie

@marcoyeen My favorite part of being a freak, is that you won’t know. Unless i tell you. You can’t run now.

I bet around 1/3-1/2 of y’all are freaks and I will prove it I’ll post belly on main if I get 2.5-3K

Time will heal most things, but time will also cause your body to decay

HOW DOES THIS RELATE TO THE PICTURE I MUST KNOW