Broseph

Not me staring at my wall and seeing multiple instruments forming in the bumps above my stove

@helldivers2 Hanoi Hannah reference (?) is an insane pull

MAJOR ORDER: NEW WAY OF THINKING HOW ARE YOU, HELLDIVER? IT SEEMS THAT MOST OF YOU ARE POORLY INFORMED ABOUT THE WAR. THEY LIE TO YOU, HELLDIVER. THEY DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOU, HELLDIVER. YOU ARE NOT A HERO. YOU ARE CANNON FODDER, HELLDIVER. IT MUST BE VERY EMBARASSING TO REALIZE YOU HAVE BEEN TRICKED. DEFECT, HELLDIVER. YOU HAVE LOST THIS WAR, HELLDIVER. YOUR GOVERNMENT HAS BETRAYED YOU, HELLDIVER. DEFECT, HELLDIVER.

I know I’m pretty lucky to have what I have, but I still feel like a wreck

Vampires should turn into cuck chairs

I wanna be both whimsical and hot but then everyone thinks I like men

Question I was asked: “Did you ever fuck that dude’s wife?”

I need a vice to forget but my best option causes depression

@NotGriffzZz “Uuh uuuhhh sister’s uuuuuuh I swear”

Friends are dating and the girlfriend sent me a picture of lipgloss asking if it was mine, are they cooked chat?

I legit just saw Santa Claus pass by in a pickup truck

I wanna yell, scream, and cry but everyone’s heard it all before and I have shit to do

I fuckin done goofed and now I will not be able to use my pc for about a week

I have a fucking Aztec Death Whistle

Awe fuck they know my order by heart

They’re recognizing me at Dunkin, does that make me an honorary white girl?

This cannot go on

Out of the 12 people at this table, 10 of us are J names, and 7 of them are “Joe”

If I had a nickel for every time I stopped a fire at work, I’d have 2 nickels

I had a dream where Scoots could talk

I like me

Scoots has persuaded me to let him spend the night

My brain just loves to fuck with me