Bruce Bangers

Me hitting the loudest joint in the county fair parking lot like I just invented agriculture

White people could NEVER

Got fucking drunk and rediscovered one of the first songs I ever snorted percs to. I think 2010? Maybe 2009 FUCKING BANGER

I’m gonna be real for a second. This hantavirus cruise ship ordeal is making me a bit nervous…

@e0syn How do I explain this to my girlfriend?? Do I have to have sexual relations with a man now?? Or can I just pay money like a politician

if u read this ur gay

@90s_Honda Take joy in waking up feeling super comfortable. Take joy in the first shower of the day. Take joy in having that first cup of coffee. Just find joy in the things that you enjoy in your life. Which i feel like is cars lol

@90s_Honda That’s only 90% happiness. We as humans constantly seek gratification. That’s homeostasis. Once you seek to just find happiness in the day to day, that’s when you will find the most joy.

wonder if I’ll ever be %100 happy

@boomyzoomer @more_meat_loaf Can you imagine showing your grandchildren such a phrase? We live in the best timeline

@boomyzoomer @more_meat_loaf 15 glizzys sans chili be suuuuuuuper homosexual. Idk why just feels like it

Imagine you're on a hunting trip and bro busts this out and starts going to town

@WhittleDick_ You do learn how quiet the hours of 12-6 are most nights.

@BruceBangers Oh yeah but you learn things about yourself. Sleep isn’t as necessary as you think. I didn’t hate the shift. Liked the quiet

Took a long nap my sleep is gonna be fucked

@WhittleDick_ Feels weird going to sleep when the sun is up for the first few weeks. Then the exhaustion sets in

@WhittleDick_ You gotta work an overnight job. Over the last 2 months I’ve learned to sleep at any moment just to recover the 8 hours I’m not getting overnight

@boomyzoomer Dollar tree for sure

where can i get a normal life

@boomyzoomer *retarde

@boomyzoomer Ima be honest this makes me wanna order the fattest retard with cheese ever. Maybe even a triple retard

me

top shelf zaza disrupted my circadian rhythm

@boomyzoomer I haven't slumbered for so many eons, I can't tell if I'm hallucinating because of the sleep deprivation or if it's because of the Gorilla Glue Lemon.

Had six beers and decided the only way to conquer my fear of heights is to learn how to fly a plane. Rational right?

@90s_Honda yo I’m buying a Honda next week. Not sure the make and model. It’s a 2006. It kinda looks like a retarded Chrysler 300? 110k miles. White. That’s all I remember. Also v6