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I’m not used to posting things like this, but I want to be a bit more transparent.
These past few weeks I’ve been way less active, and honestly, May has probably been my worst month in trading — not performance-wise, but mentally.
I’ve never really struggled with psychology before, but since moving into futures, I slowly started treating it like a game without even realizing it. And it’s starting to cost me a lot.
I’ve been losing more accounts, revenge trading — things I never used to do. Thinking in ways I never did before. On top of that, I’m finishing my studies right now, so my mind is constantly overloaded and trying to manage everything at once has been harder than expected.
Even stupid little mistakes keep piling up. Like forgetting to close a position on Friday night and losing another account because of it. Small details, but they slowly drag you deeper.
I’ve been thinking a lot about stopping futures completely. But at the same time, I know the opportunities it could bring me are huge. I think what I really need is a new environment and to get myself back under control — and thankfully that change is coming soon.
Things are complicated right now, but I wanted to show some transparency because the journey is not always pretty.
Still, deep down, I know this is my lowest point. And I truly believe that once I get through this phase, better days will come. I know I’ll make it. And once I overcome this version of myself, I’ll be unstoppable.
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