Chris Phillips

This account is an early seasons account. The good seasons. Maybe people like season 10 through 35. We don't know. Frankly, we don't want to know. It's a market we can do without.

The first time I watched this as a kid I laughed so hard my brain hurt and I thought I was going to suffocate.

Weak, woke, de-growth… what the hell is even that?! And mate, it’s been the ‘year of the conservative’ for the last 12 years and it’s been a slip and slide to the bowels of hell the entire time. Go away.

It's time! Our #BlackFriday sale is live. Get 50% off all plugins until Nov 30, 23:59 EET.

@ethanniall101 @NBreen89 Absolute gold

@C_F_Phillips @NBreen89

@ethanniall101 Sleeping patterns making porn for the visually impaired

Sleeping pattern so fucked it's entered the porn industry

@ethanniall101 @NBreen89 Jumping Jehovah it took me a moment to get that one.

My nephew just said I have wrinkles... Not helping my mid life crisis kiddo

@ethanniall101 @NBreen89 I feel like the sequels could just go Fast and The Furious style and just keep going. Until the final remaining cast members die during the filming of 87 Eleven

@C_F_Phillips @NBreen89 Can't wait for the spinoffs. 7 Eleven the Movie, 7 Eleven the Movie the Game, 7 Eleven the Musical Legoset, and of course, the sequel, 8 Eleven

@NBreen89 @ethanniall101 Fuck no man, he’s no older than 7! Sorry, I just wanted to make a bit of a song out of it. 7 rhymes with 11 right?

@ethanniall101 Mid life crisis!? Aren't you only 11?

You couldn’t get away with making The Thick Of It now. Real life has surpassed satire.

@ethanniall101 Good lad

@C_F_Phillips I said something a lot worse in my head haha

I genuinely said "have a splendid day" to a Customer today. By god. What have I become?

@ethanniall101 Is it as infuriatingly hard as the old ones?

My god, I've only played two levels of the new Crash game and it's already amazing!! 😍

@ethanniall101 I’ll give you 1 British pound of capital to come in at the ground floor!!

I genuinely think I've just stumbled onto a genius business idea 😍😍

Thanks to the internet, people’s idiocy is now available to see 24/7. Anyone else find it exhausting?

If a county can enter lockdown, and people still don’t care, is there really any point trying? Doesn’t feel like it at this point.