Floyd Jewell

I saw fly, actually sitting at a table in Waffle House this morning! It was placing their order as I sat staring! The fly said, I think I’ll have a large turd, light brown. medium soft and could you make sure it has lots of corn in it! Waitress, Coming right up! I immediately left!

@sweet_nector1 Wicks

I bet no one would know what this is used for?

@Avabelly__ Looks like pretty sloppy work to me

The homeowner refuses to pay for these bases. She thinks they're unsafe, and I told her there's absolutely no problem because 90% of the beam is in contact with the concrete. I told her I'd post the picture so she could see all the expert comments, who confirm they're perfectly safe. 💪🏻

@AmazingEyes1122 Can of spam

No one across the country seems to know what this is.

@rovnni What else could I say but let's go

SEJAM SINCEROS! se Deus chegasse agora, sentasse ao seu lado e dissesse: "seu tempo aqui na terra acabou." o que você diria a Ele?

@sweet_nector1 Ash tray I think

What was this used for back in the day?

@MikeBales Good one

If you don’t like my posts, my perspective, or my political views, feel free to—

@AmazingEyes1122 Beer can opener with a soda pop name on it

Do you know the name of this object?

@onmyway1133 Milk can

I bet nobody seems to guess what this is.

@USATRUMPMAN1 Scotch Tape.

Don't mean to brag or anything but I never had to tell my kids to do somethin twice. 37 times maybe, but never two times!

So, an AR-15 Is useless because it offers no benefits to society! Well, neither does a whiny Liberal yet here you are!

@sweet_nector1 Juicer

No one so far has guessed the name of this thing. Can you?

@TheDarkHumours A fool and their boat will soon be parted.

2 girls one boat.

@sweet_nector1 Day old wind up alarm clock, gosh terrible ringer. It would wake up a Rooster, before it could cockal doodle doo...

I'm sure no one would be able to recognize what this is.

@BamaSaltyMarine If you wouldn't leave Hash marks those panties, she wouldn't mind.

She wears my T-shirts to bed. She wears my jacket when she's cold. She even wears my boxers. But I wear her panties one time and suddenly I have "serious mental issues" and I've "overstepped my boundaries"!

@MikeBales I've got a bottle of Thunderbird in my fridge right now.. reminds me to never drink wine again. Boy what a headache

What’s missing?