Carly J

Ultimate over stimmy, arguing on the phone with Bell internet, scraping ice off the windshield, no gloves on.

do you know how ugly you'd have to be for ariana grande to actually avoid a married man😭😭

Instead of texting ‘on my way’ I’m just gonna start sending this

Imagine hating me & im just at bulk barn snacking out of the bins

this is so valid

Lorde snapped. Idgaf she shushed you trashbags!! Probably deserved it <3

Mind you it’s 2004 I’m fully shaved at a SUM 41 concert in a tank top & tie

this is who shows up when you take 3 benadryls

how it feels to be a beautiful woman forced to work on a monday

10 beers deep standing outside trying to make eye contact til someone offers me a cigarette

me testing the firmness of every avocado in the grocery store

why what happened

The sheets in the dryer when they bunch up in a cozy corner & STAY WET why I oughta

The patrons of Gusteau’s restaurant hearing a rat cooked the food but it’s low key delicious:

I’ll smack the eggnog right out your paw idgaf

history rhymes