c l u x

Thank fuck for music

Just back from picking my teenage daughter up from an 18th birthday party. When I arrived there were no fewer than ten lads chucking their guts up outside and a crowd of girls ripping the absolute piss out of them. Cracking scenes

Interviewer: Why did you leave your last job? Me: Because of something my boss said Interviewer: It says here you were fired Me: That's the thing he said

I’m not proud of it but if Forrest Gump started talking to me on a bench I’d have left

@WanderingSadu One of my mates who's never been before said it'll won't be too bad as it's off season. I haven't the heart to tell him that's worse! It'll be like Michael Jackson's Thriller on the sea front 😂😂

@CarlClux Absolutely 🤣🤣🤣

About to get on train. Overdressed for Gt Yarmouth. I have a litre of sloe gin, 4 #cans cider and a celebration Easter egg.

'Squish' by Gretel is a cracking debut album. Your lugs will love it.

@DustyPee Not fucking likely!! 😂😂😂 I don't have any where near the prey that you probably have there. A rabbit or some old people, that's about it 😀

@CarlClux Get one! 🤣

Cheers fellow spa chemical and technician specialists.

@willo_ian ❤️

Today is 'OUR' day. A time to remember those lost at a football match we attended....... A football match. Fans and friends died at a football match and we were vilifed for decades, we all stood strong and proved the establishment wrong. Today is OUR DAY, JFT97 YNWA ❤️👍🏻🙏🏻👊🏻💔

@DustyPee Ok, thanks 👍🏻 Absolutely amazing view! Nothing like that from outside my window in the English countryside. Although I don't have a shooting table in my garden.

@CarlClux Geologists call them rocks.

@DustyPee I wasn't trying to be rude mate, promise. I get what you're saying and thanks for explaining. What's this though?

@CarlClux My shooting table and a fire pit. I know they are highly unusual things to have in the country. 🙄

@DustyPee The fuck is that?

Up and about because my mum's coming over today so I'm cleaning top to bottom even though my place is fucking spotless!! 😂 I'm 52!! 😂

most cutting thing you can say is "who's this clown?" because it implies they're a) a clown & b) not even one of the better-known clowns

I've just watched this. A great film 👌🏻

Woke up all spritely and fancied knocking up a big ole fry up. Not going to get too far with a can of beans and half a loaf of bread though Carlos 😩

An evening of splendid tunes 👌🏻

@2LivesCid Good man 🙌🏻 Glad to hear it.

@CarlClux Fantastic Getting smashed today Music sun and in a good place

I remember when a coffee cost 25p in the local spit and sawdust cafe The young today are happy to pay £5.50 for a hazelnut latte in Starbucks than save up to buy a house. Thick as pig mince..

@2LivesCid I'm still off the sauce mate. Boring as hell but your posts are keeping me amused today 😂🙌🏻 How's tricks with you?

@CarlClux Hey Carl. Long time no see. Having a beer?