The Character Is…

Maybe I'll get #censored before any of my #dreams of making it big come true... #WokeRap #Awaken #HigherSelf #Truth #InternetofThings #SocialMedia #FactCheck youtu.be/DQr4vFPoqks

You say you won’t exchange social media accounts until you’ve been on a date. I won’t go on a date until I’ve verified them via social media. We are not the same!

¿Wut? lol

It’s the girls who respond to the “I’ll fall for you if…” prompt with “you ignore me” that also are the ones who complain about ‘how men suck’, which are the toxic problem with our modern dating culture.

I swear, the “Have Kids” section of Hinge doesn’t show up until after you match… this app is out here trying to trick us

when avoidants avoid you 🥰🥰🥰

@elonmusk @DOGE If you need someone who loves to audit… literally everything… I started in public accounting as a CPA auditing financials and now can’t help but audit literally everything I come across from marketing to food to business to behaviors… let me @TheRappingCPA know 🤓

Only with public support can @DOGE succeed. The bad guys will do anything they can, legal or otherwise, to stop us.

This is Derrick Braxton. You don’t want to mess with Derrick. #HarryPotter #HogwartsLegacymc

I’m attempting to help by reaching out here through my Twitter — we can prove her identity or please advise how she can/should proceed

@AppleSupport my friends phone was hacked into by her roommate, who knew her password and reset her Face ID to be his face, who then set the phone on protection stolen mode. She cannot access any of her apps and can’t reset because it requires Face ID. Please help

High Thought: do you think if you used a full body massage chair for multiple hours every single day, it would break? Like how frequently and for how long are you supposed to go max? Asking for myself.

I don’t think liking sweet treats/sugar is really something you should be proud of in general, but definitely not to put in your dating profile…

Your new all time low is having your most exciting part of the night be when you return home all alone to drop a deuce instead of hang with your stuff sock.

I met up with a girl who was very eager to hang out for coffee. Even though I wasn’t entirely into it or in the mood, I powered through and actually had a nice time. We both expressed interest in wanting to hang out again. By happen chance, we ran into each other that evening, had an awesome night, and I ended up spending the night at her place. The next morning, we went to IHOP with her friend who put it on her card (I figured we’d square up later). We went back, watched some Netflix and then I left. We had some light convo over the course of the next few days, and I inquired about hanging out again the upcoming weekend which was met with the typical LA “maybe!” response. The girl then proceeded to ghost me. I followed up a couple times and then called it quits, as is standard with the inability to communicate in modern dating culture. A week later I got a Venmo request from her friend for the IHOP. Can you believe she had the audacity to view my IG messages which said “seen”, and my story, still follow me, yet not be mature enough to respond to any of my messages, then talk about me in order give her friend my info to Venmo request me? Naturally, they don’t call me Petty Ca$h for nothing, so I had some fun with it. Immature actions are met with immature responses! I just feel bad for the friend who had to hold the collateral👻 Word to the wise: don’t ghost me or you’ll get hit with a fee💰

What does one do when they’re attracted to trends of the past? Not a fan of the thick eyebrow movement, or the baggy pants, or the highwaisted jeans, or the body hair, or styles. But if that’s all that’s in, are you forced to settle?? #highthoughtsatnight

Irrational Fears Number 137: Circular (non-elongated) toilet bowls

Donating more than $5 to a charity doesn’t “make me feel good”… it makes me feel poor…

#HotTake🔥 of the Week: SmartWatches are actually useless. Nobody actually finds reading or writing texts on a watch to be more convenient.⌚️

If I identify as “they/them” will I be allowed to drive in the HOV lane?

#HotTake🔥 of the Week: No matter how much you practice, you'll never be able to become significantly faster at sprinting.🏃

Sláinte!☘️#HappyStPatricksDay #stpaddysday @cuttheactivist @Carricktor