Charlie the Clean

The Dude aBidens.

Tribute to the Colonel. @kfc #Halloween2020

My love for you will run out but the cheddar biscuits at @redlobster are endless.

Friends are like potatoes. I don't have any potatoes.

my latest creation youtube.com/watch?v=9P9zqo…

I’m a real babies man.

I love belonging to a club, because I like excluding people.

I wish my dad had a more successful job so our family could join the country club.

I always keep a cucumber at the ready so when someone tries to high-five me, I can pull it out and slap in their unexpecting hand.

I'm back, dinguses

Daniel Tiger thinks he is a 6 year old tiger but he's really a 64 year old man on an acid trip.

Moms are always grumpy. Even when they're smiling, deep in their hearts they're still grumpy.

I think I would like to marry a super model who is nice and also popular with people.

I'm like the Helen Keller of Easter egg hunts.

@3reeka yes it did.

Moms be like. pic.twitter.com/tHMONhongz

Power's out and I'm sitting here eating like a king.

Ok, Elvis in slow motion definitely sounds like Satan's first solo record.

The new Mad Max movie should just be called Car Wars.

And then there was that one time, after deep meditation, I thought I could fly and you saved me from jumping off of the roof.