Rev Colin Scrote

Word(s) of the Day: “Cleave the Pin”

1920 Advertisement for the 'Wonder-Worker', 'to be inserted into the rectum during sleep... to enjoy good health, sleep, & rest, no man or woman should be without it.'

“I am absolutely certain that I shall get through all right, but in case the unexpected happens I shall rest content with the knowledge that I have done my duty – and one can’t do more.” Lt Boswell went on to be killed within the first hour of the battle on July 1 1916. #Somme

These are 19th century spermatorrhoea rings, an anti-masturbatory device. They are steel, nickel-plated & made in Britain. They were designed to stop masturbation, but were also worn at night to wake the wearer up when they got an erection & prevent wet dreams

King Henry I of England (c.1068-1135) had 20 illegitimate children by 6 different mistresses. William of Malmesbury said the King was ‘free from carnal desires’, & ‘His intercourse with women was undertaken not for the satisfaction of his lusts, but from his desire for children’

Untitled by Jyoti Bhatt, (1957)

Word of the Day: “Timbersome”

Sorry to all who saw that. I was excited to be back playing and am an aggressive player who revels in the physical, rough and tumble side of the game but that was inexcusable. The red mist descended and I lashed out. Apologies to those injured and to the wider badminton community

@JMPSimor @BorisJohnson . @GaryLineker

Sorry for all the questions but if @BorisJohnson stands down or is kicked out who will be the next PM?

@David_Ephgrave An expensive barbers chair?

Nice to see #PrinceHarry with his finger on the pulse of the nation ... hopefully he will also be encouraging @TheDukeOfYork to talk to the US authorities about #Epstein

6.40am on a Saturday morning. Never too early to be at my desk working on finding 6'6" scouser #KevinParle. He will be found... 07908 617694

Word(s) of the Day: “Dive in the Bushes”

I can't enough good things about this interview ... @ColinMurray and Ellery Hanley ... compelling listening bbc.co.uk/programmes/m00…

40 years ago a drunk, angry woman came at me with a broken bottle in an alley behind Broughty Ferrry Safeway’s. I calmed her down and said you are a wild animal but you have the voice of an angel. Let’s hear more from the angel. That woman was Dame Vera Lynn. Rest is history RIP