Jerry Garcia

I recently started wearing hats for the first time in my life, I guess you can say I’m in a New Era.

My super power is settling in and turning on the game just as it’s going on the longest tv commercial break.

Wait, so we we’re using Fake ID’s this whole time? Gangsta 😎

Soon as this hangover passes I will be taking over the world. 🤕

Yo: Pa mi cumple no me anden comprando regalos que no necesito nada. Tambien Yo:

When the ball gets kicked over to the Tio’s side of the party.

“At frijoles en la casa!” - los frijoles

Me running to get my funds out of Wells Fargo knowing damn well I’ve been overdraft for 2 weeks

I finally got around to read The Giving Tree and bruhhh, fucked my shit up. 😭🥺 🌳 🍎 #thegivingtree

Her: don’t be out here entertaining these hoes Me:

Aye fellas, do me a favor and stop sliding into my gf DMs, theres only so many guys she can turn down, shit is stressful.

If I would’ve hit the mega I woulda sign @JuanSoto25_ to a 1 year 100 milly contract and have the best Sunday league team ever!

Catch @ComedianJerryG LIVE June 2 at the #breaimprov! You don’t want to miss it! 🎟 bit.ly/3lNtstt

Tempe, AZ! Just got the call I’m coming Cinco De Mayo!! One Night Only! Tickets available now on my website! Tempe Improv @ Tempe Improv instagram.com/p/CcBsvc8vvZQ/…

This is what 18 blends of filters look like. Thanks @frankielealphotography for the pic I had no idea you were taking 😉 instagram.com/p/Cb-l4lLpiWR/…

Just posted a photo instagram.com/p/Cbfq7Q1pFWC/…

It’s International Women’s Day all you domestic females need to chill.

El Paso is a mood. Always a great time here! 3 more shows this weekend! Get your tickets! Laff2nite.com @elpasocomicstrip @ El Paso Comic Strip instagram.com/p/CauzjkoFfx2/…

Shows, shows, shows! More dates to be announced soon! Tickets available now at comedianjerrygarcia.com #california #newmexico #colorado #comedianjerrygarcia #comedytour instagram.com/p/CaVinUSPaEo/…

I feel like the Mexican Martin Luther King Jr “Tengo Un Sueño” 🥱😴🙃 #MLKDay2022