Sam French

@whatdotcd Be careful brother

been thinking about my low HRV a lot

@JonTanners Go back to sleep

@gkla @calpolypomona I want to come to this

When I was 8 years old there’s no world in which you could convince me that the mini-bar m&m’s weren’t $5,000+

Need i remind you that I’m so 2008; you’re so 2000 and late

The greatest thing to come from professional football is taunting

The only difference between us and the British is they pronounce lieutenant LUFFtenant

@gkla This is upper echelon

Missed connections: Tesla supercharging station

They could never make The Office today. One day is not enough time to make a whole tv show

imagine how much happier you would be if you were this person

How are we doing on breadsticks over here

i’m rooting for them 😪

Posting "wow pretty problematic" under every single person's Spotify wrapped and then responding "it's not my job to educate you" when they ask what I mean by that.

Look at the end of the day it’s nighttime

I dont want to watch something just matrix incept it to me so i will have already watched it please im fkn begging u

benadryl: oh you’ll go to sleep alright me: awesome! and then i’ll wake up? benadryl: in a sense

Silly Goose Studios called they wanna offer you a 3-picture deal

*me getting into an Uber after 3 bud lights* Yo Whatsup beast

The peoples republic of calabasas