Dave

This Saturday, A special adaptation of a sell-out Edinburgh Fringe Show is coming to South Glos! Matt Hobs presents his comedy Almost 100% Badgers at Emersons Green Village Hall, BS16 7AP, 21 February, 7.30pm to 8.30pm. Recommended for ages 16+. Booking is required. Visit orlo.uk/Almost_100_Bad…

Crazy to say, and I know we’re only 3 points off the play offs, but I’m kind of resigned to this season being done based on how this window has gone so far.

Mistletoe literally means ‘shit twig’.

Have the courage to be ignorant of a great number of things, in order to avoid the calamity of being ignorant of everything. SYDNEY SMITH

Clearly onside

What an offside call linesman

FIFA inventing a peace prize to give to Trump is beyond parody… #WorldCup2026

We spent thousands so Laura could access treatment abroad & we're definitely not the only ones. It always frustrated me that this information simply wasn't captured anywhere Now @ourbrainbankuk are launching a research project to do just that so pls help ➡️obbuk.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_86…

Lemurs’ vaginas have no permanent opening. For 24 to 72 hours in July of a good year, their vagina will open, there’s a brief frenzy of mating and then they close up again.

If every zombie bit one new person a day, starting with one zombie, the whole world would be zombified in 34 days.

@qikipedia An idea for creating some new comedy material maybe @MattHobscomedy ? 🦡

In order to write his book Being A Beast, author Charles Foster spent time living as a badger in a sett, sleeping by day, prowling at night and eating worms.

The factory of the future will have only two employees, a man and a dog. The man will be there to feed the dog. The dog will be there to stop the man touching the equipment. WARREN BENNIS

A 1529 manual on how to dance to impress girls specifically recommends ‘never fart when you are dancing: grit your teeth and compel your arse to hold back the fart’.

I have so much respect for @true_north_res and her tenacity in the face of this awful disease. She created braincancerjustice.org to give hope to anyone unlucky enough to be dealing with the devastation of a brain cancer diagnosis. Truly inspirational x

@shitscaredmum @OfficialUoM bbc.co.uk/news/articles/…

Turki Alalshikh has made a visit to #BristolCity to meet the owners and check out the facilities. It’s indicated that there are no problems with the asking price and that Lansdown is comfortable with their plans so far.

Tomorrow #BrainCancerJustice will assemble at Parliament Square for a silent protest & speeches by those whose lives have been impacted by brain cancer❤️ We’re all working so hard, yet treatments haven’t changed in decades Please help us by signing ⬇️ petition.parliament.uk/petitions/7388…

Defending? Nah mate. Just the 49 shots in the Bristol City vs. Hull game.

A Korean folk tale suggests the common cold originated when a prince with two penises couldn’t find a wife with two vaginas. Eventually he died, became a ghost and ‘fulfilled his lust in death by releasing himself in people’s nostrils’.

🧠 Today is #GlioblastomaAwarenessDay. For 60+ years, life expectancy for glioblastoma has barely improved. We’re working to change that through research, trials & innovation. #BrainTumourResearch #HopeThroughScience 👉Read more: shorturl.at/feqb8