Barefoot Cuntessa

God gives his hottest angel the longest nipple hairs

Real question: how do I get rid of 95% of my stuff in a few months when I have no time or energy

The veil is so thin at dollar tree I get scared

Sick 4 times in 4 months what am I doing wrong

I took her to the 97 year old New York diner still serves their Coke the old fashioned way then I freaked it

I was supposed to be here but I fell asleep this is the top 10 worst moments of my life

all adventurous women do

@DasKapithole walking into heaven and kissing jesus while god witnesses

Walking into a greenpoint bar and kissing the bartender while the lead singer of all time low is there to witness it is considered a hard launch right?

Yippeemaxxing

Never let anyone try to tell you that you can’t put nair directly on your butthole

@vintages1ut Love u sweet girl

a man appearing out of nowhere after years just to tell me he likes an of model that looks like me …….. insane

It’s the season for eating mudbugs and renewing my vehicle registration yayayay

streeteasy fiend

@86GraySkies Dolores park dillydallymaxxing from a year ago came up in my photo memories today and I was like damn need some of that rn

it’s not all going to be okay…… it’s all going to be great!

unc is short for uncrustable

teamwork makes the cream work or whatever they say

I have been in my hammock reading and leeching all the sun’s power and turning it into physical beauty with my gorgeous glowing face