Doug Carter

@JoelStave69 @JohnRockerBurn Bring some for Doug

@JohnRockerBurn @DougCarter2171 En Cabo con Xanax.

My Retard friend thinks the beers are dollar a pop tomorrow for the Nebraska USC game. Can one of u confirm?

@JoelStave69 @JohnRockerBurn I don’t speak Puerto Rican Joel!

@DougCarter2171 @JohnRockerBurn Estoy drogado, ayúdame, una chica me dijo eso.

@JohnRockerBurn Gay

These hands don’t haze

@SkersOnTop Last night was one of those nights

@DougCarter2171 One of the best drunk xeets I’ve ever seen

Imagine a chick that has massive tits and Guinness came out of her tits. I’d get down on a knee

If I got paid to turn beer into piss I’d be a millionaire

Pulled a Carter Jensen today and missed my 11am. #heyheyhey #royals

When you say the n word and instead of her saying it back she calls you a racist

@DougCarter2171 This not banging

My reaction when I figured out the hawktini girl had a boyfriend

@AlexNewman55 Too bad I’m still killing myself

Who would you rather have your daughter bring home? Connor Essegian or Dylan Raiola (Killing yourself is not an option)

Professor called on me thinking i wasn’t paying attention but I still got the answer right

Watching Nebraska play any sport is like watching Revenge of the Sith hoping for a different outcome, but Anakin turns to the dark side no matter how hard you want it to end differently.

I would’ve rather got 50 bombed by Florida. Fuck you Matt Rhule fuck you Will Compton you ruined the Nebraska run

Horrible call ref! That was not a foul!

Where is the ceremonial punt? #nebraskavsiowa #nebraska #sweetsixteen

@dWorthington445 When we win we are running a train on El Bar

@DougCarter2171 Good Peter

No more Nebraska nice to these Iowa fans. We are in Houston we have to assimilate to their culture. Every Iowa fan you see gets shot on sight