Emily Lloyd-Tait

⚠️PUBLIC HEALTH ALERT – NEW VENUES AND TRANSPORT ROUTES OF CONCERN⚠️ NSW Health has been notified of a number of new venues and transport routes of concern associated with confirmed cases of #COVID19.

I'm at the Henson and a kid is sporting an actual toy shiv in the playroom. Tiny criminal at work ganking smaller kids for their ice cream money.

My relationship has reached its pinnacle - he brought me a Bunnings sausage sandwich in bed and now I'll have to stay with him forever.

There is a woman holding a giant paper bag on my train and inside are at least four other smaller handbags that she and her companion are discussing in great stylistic detail. Why so many bags, lady? The people need to know.

Look, I dunno how you do bdays but getting a bit pissy on fancy wine in the office and discussing the Dark Knight is how I do pre-loading

I just had to stop my car to let a cat cross at a pedestrian crossing. They don't teach you that at the RTA.

Going to a child's birthday party hungover could have been a bad idea, except that all the mini pizzas and juice was exactly what I needed.

Now that I know what a squat rack is I would like to unlearn this information as quickly as possible.

Missed my stop cos I was reading a buzzfeed article made up of dumb tweets. I am everything my parents feared my generation would become.

Exciting news! Time Out Group has acquired its licensing partner, Time Out Australia (that’s us). mumbrella.com.au/time-group-acq…

Celebrating not having a stomach parasite anymore by trying to eat a whole spatchcock, roast pumpkin, mixed pickles and oysters by myself.

Young Emily wanted a job that involved travel. Old Emily thinks she was an idiot. The commute to Tullamarine is not getting shorter.

My doctor told me to avoid fat and sugar. So I ate a burger, deep dish pizza, a Picnic bar and ice cream because I'm a prize idiot.

The new world number one restaurant is Eleven Madison Park from New York. #theworlds50best.

Best Restaurant in Australasia and number 32 on the #theworlds50best for 2017 is Melbourne's Attica.

Dan Hunter and his rural oasis Brae make it into the #theworlds50best at number 44. Home town pride is strong in the Melb Exhibition Hall.

A pack of small children are singing a low, droning chant on the tram so I have to assume we're about to be sacrificed to an ancient God.

It's taking every shred of my self control not to demand Bf stops at every old wares shop on the Pac Hwy. That's my Christmas gift to him.

I put my wallet in the fridge with the Xmas ham two days ago. Tried to visit post office, butcher and diner since then. Dec has broken me.

Listening to someone 5 wines deep disect why our boat has a confederate flag. It's the boating company's flag and looks nothing like it.