John Halo

i think they're gonna make a really weird looking dog soon. it's just how the world works yknow

@wetsentence I don’t need lessons

@EpicMasterChief 💀 how to scare a woman away step 1

however comma you’ve been lackluster in you’re efforts with the king

@texmeplease I’d save so much money

if i could lick my own elbow i’d never leave the house

It’s crazy that they just kept making these long after they were relevant. I wonder is Shinedown did one

There a suspicious amount of young people in the crowd for the MTV unplugged performance of the scorpions

@luvusumibb Get it

fine ass older lady just said my lips are sexy and she’d love a black lipstick mark on her cheeks #aura

@juicerrrrrrrrr What the hell is his problem

@cabatchiIDK It’s cool how well the geometry lines up although the transition between Tsavo Highway and The Storm is kinda fudged

I can tell that Mellisa McCarthy said no to this mobile game ad so they got a Melissa McCarthy type

Mick Jagger was kind of the original Post Malone

They named a font after you lol

@Marv1nDemon God bless you. Leave me alone

@turtlekiosk Isn’t this the plot of the royal tenenbaums

star wars is funny because imagine fighting over the same girl with your buddy and then the situation resolves itself because you find out she's your sister. and then you become a monk anyway

Sometimes the stilted way that I type when I’m not really paying attention makes it look like I’m trying to aave and I think that’s beautiful

@phlegmme Square stans keep telling me to unalive myself

Thinking of deleting the Shapes app. It’s honestly rly toxic these days and most of my mutuals have moved to Dog already

This isn’t even uncslop anymore it’s genuinely uncspired

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land fuckin somewhere idk

Pretty good chance this dude my blood relative