Eradicated

So my Twitter was hacked and all my tweets were deleted/everyone got unfollowed. So if you get a follow from me it’s actually the weirdo you know.

Bartending while ovulating on Easter is not a vibe. Dicks just rising like Jesus.

I haven’t posted since 2024 but I can tell you that I’m almost a year sober of alcohol, I have a thyroid problem, been crowned favorite bartender by a prestigious panel of a bartenders committee, and my tits are still huge. We vibin.

To all the Tulane girls who had me make 75 aperol spritz’s while I remembered y’all’s names for tabs and only ordered one by one back to back. Yet tipped $1-$5 on your $60-$90 tabs on your parents credit card. I am jealous.

I’m not even heavily tattooed and men I’ve gone on dates with that don’t have any always feel the need to tell me their horrible ideas for the first one they want. It’s like fucking clockwork. That beer you accidentally spilt on me is the wettest I’ve been the whole time.

Never in my life did I ever think I’d have to get my thyroid checked. Well I guess this is growing up.

I bring a bag of resistance bands with me to work when I know it’s going to be slow. So my coworker saw me doing some reps and goes “look at you doing your muscle mommy things”.

This couple in front of me at Walgreens just had a box of condoms and a couple of gatorades. I’m over here buying blister bandaids walking funny for a different reason. Le sigh.

No offense but who keeps a post up on their Instagram the day they were there after pulling a gun on our staff?

@DailyMirror The south out here like 🤦‍♀️

UK to be blasted by 48 hour 26C heatwave with five cities in England the hottest mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/u…

Not me at work holding baby frenchies watching as gals were doing pole dancing for a benefit

After a very long and hot weekend at work. My coworkers and I had a gun pulled on us over a guy who wouldn’t stop harassing a gal in the front of our bar. So there’s that.

I think I’ve found my happy place when it comes to working. One job I work at is a brewery and pour/talk beer being more laid back. The other I fully bartend at a pool/motel which women are allowed to go topless/full body positive with a lot of debauchery. It’s wonderful.

It’s that feeling of waking up in the middle of the night to go pee, but remember there are ice cream sandwiches in the freezer

I sweat through my shirt at work so I took it off forgetting I was wearing a pleather bra, with a leather motorcycle hat and black shorts and all day I got called a “leather mami” and I’m here for it.

I had someone ask me “what beer do you think is good for gals?” and I just replied “all beer is good for gals”.

I get to play bingo and pet bar cats today while one of my best guy friends is bartending. I’m truly about to have the best night.

Nothing like trying to be hot trying to straddle a dude making out in the front seat. Then my ass honked the horn.

I understand this sounds horrible but I found out my grandma on my dad’s side finally died and I’ve never felt better. She was the reason I hate religion to this day, abusive and mean. Hated I was left handed and beat me for that and not going to church. Relief.

If you in the service industry you hate Jazz Fest, also having people telling you “I’m basically a local been going to Jazz Fest for 18 years” get fucked.

What’s so sad about leaving an abusive workplace is you still have those feelings over the weekend that your manager or owner is going to yell at you. Then I came in and my manger was like “hey, I hope you had a good weekend, heard you did great and had a good Sunday off”