Evan Nichols

Links to all my published works here: linktr.ee/evannichols #WritingCommunity #IWriteBooks #webcomic #NotAFoodProductDoNotEat

#Headline2027 – Leveraging his moment of fame, Jimothy’s podcast did well for the first few months, but devolved into conspiracy theories and promoting his crypto-coin. #CautionaryTale

July 16th is World Snake Day, so happy birthday to Jörmungandr, the Midgard Serpent! #HangInThere #WorldSnakeDay

The British version of the Human Torch isn’t a really great superhero, but he’s quite handy to have along when one goes camping. #OrCaveExploring

I don't know, man; why doesn't the newspaper in that "proof of life" photo of Mitch McConnell cast a shadow? #CouldThatBePhotoshopped #JustSaying

Whoever has the Death Note book right now is teasing us. #JustDoIt #ComeOnAlready #TrifectaFTW

It's so weird that billionaires, conservatives and Republicans watch dystopian movies and think, "Oh, YEAH! Let's do THAT!" #MissedThePoint #DystopicMeansBad

Perhaps if we tried to understand those huge, misshapen trucks, we wouldn't call them monsters. #TheyAreNoisyAndSad #DontForceThemToPerformForUs

#ProTip - If you don't want the US bombing your country, obtain the full, unredacted #EpsteinFiles and release them to the world. Problem solved! #LookingAtYouIran #ReleaseTheEpsteinFiles #DontBombIran

#FACT - The unredacted Epstein Files have STILL NOT BEEN RELEASED in accordance to the law! #EpsteinFiles #ReleaseTheEpsteinFiles #DontStopTalkingAboutTheEpsteinFiles #EpsteinTrials

Just realized that in the entire Wenatchee/East-Wenatchee Metro Area, I may be the only guy with purple hair. #YeahImThatGuy #LifeGoals

I just spoke to Senator Mitch McConnell by phone and he wants us to pack SCOTUS with liberal justices and undo pretty much every Republican action since the Reagan administration. #LetsGiveHimHisDyingWish #DoThisForTheMitcher

After a heavy session of meditation and prayer, monks often sit in the dining hall to recover. That’s called a Refectory Period. #DadJoke

It's weird to think that it's only evening on July 3rd here, but people in New Zealand, Australia and China are already celebrating the 4th of July. #TimeZonesAreWack #EnjoyTheFireworks

Congressional 4th of July Sale! Buy three Congresspersons, and the fourth one is FREE! #AskAboutSupremeCourtJusticeBOGO

I’m so glad the World Cup is finally over! Thank you, in advance, for not telling me anything about soccer for the next four years. #DontMakeMeTapTheSign

I don’t wish anyone ill, but I wouldn’t be too sad if Mitch McConnell is dead. #HeCanBurnInHell

#CanadaFunFact – Today is Canada Day! The traditional greeting is, “Sorry, eh?” #SorryCanadaEh #HappyCanadaDay #MooseHockeyTimbits

Happy #AsteroidDay! As always, when you go outdoors, move erratically from side to side to avoid being hit by one, and wear a sturdy hat! #BetterSafeThanSorry #OnlyYouCanPreventAsteroids #ThisIsNotSteroidDay

I hope every grand jury refuses to indict anyone accused of “vandalizing” the reflecting pool. #ExceptTrumpOfCourse

Insisting there are just two genders is like saying there's only Ford or Chevy trucks and you must like one or the other, and anyone who sees or likes sedans, hatchbacks, vans or motorcycles are the mentally ill ones. #PrideMonth #AllVehiclesAreValid