FUCK MY LIFE

My boyfriend drives a 2seat sports car so I had to sit on his brothers lap. I soon felt a poke through his pants as we hit a bumpy road #FML

Today, I found my diary on my mother's nightstand. Bookmarked. #FML

My boyfriend broke up with me so i told everyone I needed time alone. Two minutes later they started blasting "All by Myself" out loud. #FML

HAPPY NEW YEAR GUYS! thought I'd say it now before you experience all your '#FML' drunk moments! Have a great night!

I was driving with no seatbelt on when I saw the police. I fumbled around for my seatbelt as they passed Iaughing. I was riding my bike #FML

Want to submit a #FML moment? Simply tweet/dm us!

(Submitted): Having to hold in a shit at the public toilets after realising someone's in the next cubicle #FML

Today, my girlfriend and I went to the cinema. Or rather, she went with her other boyfriend, and I happened to see them there. #FML

I was talking to a girl online when she said that she'd been dumped by her jerk of a boyfriend. Later we exchanged photos. It was my ex #FML

Today, right after sex, my girlfriend apologized to the neighbor for the screaming. He thanked her for the entertainment. #FML

The girl I'm secretly in love with told me she'd "brb in 10, no wait 20, oh make that 30 min" depending on her boyfriend's stamina. #FML

Today, I told a friend that he looked smarter with his glasses on. He took them off and said "oh, and now you look more pretty". #FML

Today, the real estate guy came with potential buyers to visit my house. He opened my bedroom while I was wanking. #FML