FakeStewartCoggin

The officials have cost us again! #Arsenal

@JoeyBill18 heard a rumour that Arsene will clinch a deal for either a GK, a DEF, a MID or a FWD - you heard it here first.

Who will Arsene sign? Another young player he can 'influence' like he did with my Theo.

Nine minutes into transfer deadline day... I'm getting cold sweats!

Watching Match of the Day again, how did my beloved troops not score? We'll beat Leeds at the weekend, that'll prove we're a big team.

Bloody love this time of year. Clothes for the next 12 months purchased.

Another Xmas alone with my Arsenal 20043/04 programmes. What a season that was!

All I want for Christmas is to share a bath with Henry Winter & Arsene Wenger.

Plus the landlady's cat hasn't been out for ages & has pissed all over my bed.

Sick of this weather... supply of reduced food in freezer is getting low!

@johnnwwright Hi John, good to see you on here. Look forward to pitting my cyber wit against you.

You know why England didn't win tonight... No Arsenal players. Watching old Sopranos episodes to cheer myself up!

@zonalmarking + hand cream = 3 minutes of heaven!

@zonalmarking + hand cream = 3 minutes of passion...

Sporting the side-parting look. I am now closer to being Don Draper than Jon Hamm ever has been.

Mine & Henry Winter's civil partnership will soon be announced... to him.

Can't sleep, worried about Drogba destroying Arsene's boys... again! #Arsenal #Chelsea

12 - amount of sandwiches I took from the hospitality suite at the Emirates yesterday. Bread.

Just got back from #Arsenal can't believe #WestBrom disrespected my lovely Arsene with a win.

Rewatching The Sopranos. I think I relate to Chris because we're similar. Drugs & fast women are what I'm all about.