Justin Langer

I have just finished berating our team psychologist for not using the requisite amount of exclamation points in appraising my guts and determination

India are a handy side but they lack a certain something. Wondering if they’ve tried visualisation and the poetry of Rupert McCall

Curious declaration from Pat. Can only assume Usman has a whopping carbon footprint

Like another former captain of this country, I’m afraid to say Aaron Finch is ‘yesterday’s nudes’

Loving my time in the commentary box so far. Except for Flem’s breath, bloke smell’s like an anchovy’s feet

14th October 1989. The first time I ever saw Tom Moody in the showers. I think about this every day of my life

Nothing stirs my loins as an Aussie cricket fan more than crushing countries with a negative GDP

All these persistent questions are getting tiresome. Once again, for the record, YES I would still run through a brick wall for Steve

Anyone read my interview denying the rift with Pat? Pretty believable eh?

@JustAidan11 @FoxCricket I fisted Scuba out of the attack in a Shield match one day, says all you need to know

A former Aussie cricketer has urged Justin Langer to not air his dirty laundry in public 👀 Full story 👉 bit.ly/3U0Yc8P

If Nick Hockley thinks I was ‘volatile’ then wait until he sees me after my triple shot almond cap. The fuckers are $7 in Scarborough nowadays

Looks like another paltry crowd in protest to the unholy discarding of yours truly

I see Glenn Maxwell has been piss farting around with his footwork again

Torrential rain predicted for tonight’s final. Nick Hockley’s second major mistake of the year

Doesn’t matter who wins tonight, nobody will cope with Babar Azam now he’s unlocked the power of mango salads

@S_Baratheon_ @elonmusk Elon could learn a lot from Steve

@FauxJLanger WOW! This tweet is the reason why @elonmusk bought this website.

Kane Williamson needs answers. Does he have any players who’d run thru a brick wall for him? If Tugga took a shit in the corner and asked me to protect it, I would’ve dug a moat and filled it with piss. New Zealand need to lift

I’ve always believed the big fella had an ability to speak across cultures. Especially as a god-fearing christian who unfurled some of the most repugnant sledging known to man dailymail.co.uk/sport/cricket/…

I’m always in awe of Gilly’s career. The only cricketer I ever played with who never called an opponent a cunt. Fuck knows how he played so many tests tbh

Not since Dean Jones in Madras has someone endlessly shit the bed like the South African cricket team

@GuyWood_Rabitoh Love u mate, up the sandgropers 4 lyf

@FauxJLanger Tidal Patterns, the Planet talking to us. You are a higher Power. Thank you.

Just wrapped up a marathon meditation session, aka a 4 hour facetime listening to Haydos talk about tidal patterns