Happy Halloween everyone! @FakeMayorPDX and I will be trick-or-treating as R2D2 & C3PO. Guess who's who.
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Faux Novick
68 posts
Faux Novick
@FauxNovick
Hey, you elected me. It's your fault.
America's Best Bicycling City Katılım Temmuz 2015
36 Takip Edilen31 Takipçiler
Of course @FakeMayorPDX doesn't drive his own SUV. That's what interns are for - forever circling so no need to park it. @AdamHerstein
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@FakeMayorPDX The sacred motor vehicles are all-knowing and all-powerful.
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I'll be wearing my traffic cone costume for safety. As should your children, at all times. twitter.com/PBOTinfo/statu…
Portland Bureau of Transportation@PBOTinfo
News Advisory: Commissioner @NovickOR serves as ped decoy for Oct 15 crosswalk education & enforcement action bit.ly/ZYDUyQ 🚶🚦👍
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Announcement: I will now be taking all meetings from my treehouse.
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Oh great. Now @FakeMayorPDX is gonna make me start bike-commuting to work, too. Only if I get a sweet-ass BMX out of the deal, Harlie.
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Current status: Hoarding donuts for the inevitable Donut Shortage Riots of 2015.
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@FakeMayorPDX That was my evil twin. You know I'd never be caught dead on a bus.
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I sincerely hope our beloved @FakeMayorPDX doesn't get hijacked by those bike people the way @MayorPDX did this week.
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Oh no, @FakeMayorPDX, the BIKE PEOPLE are importing OTHER BIKE PEOPLE FROM OTHER CITIES now. twitter.com/BrooklynSpoke/…
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The @FakeMayorPDX and I are pleased to announce that since it rained today, climate change is officially over. No more worries, folks!
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Of course we didn't cancel the Orange Line fireworks. Things are only a safety hazard if @FakeMayorPDX & I say they are.
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Of course they're avoidable. Everyone just needs to stay out of the way of my car. You people always overcomplicate. twitter.com/PBOTinfo/statu…
Portland Bureau of Transportation@PBOTinfo
"Traffic fatalities are avoidable." @NovickOR
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Whew. At last all these meddling bridge pedalers have gotten back in their SUVs and driven home to the suburbs, as nature intended.
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Why are all these bridges closed to real traffic? I don't remember approving this!
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