Funny Tweets

That awesome moment twitpic.com/agvu42

I just joined @metwee_en, an application to get followers easily! Just take a look if you're interested : bit.ly/Ng3MCn

iquotefunny twitpic.com/as8tgl

hystericalposts twitpic.com/as8t9c

RT ❤ NEW ❤ FOLLOWERS ➜ @JustYoungKovu @fannyrahmaasari @ShintyaTherSil_

If you don't paddle your own canoe, you don't move

I may not agree with what you have to say but I will defend to the death your right to say it

"Me, fail English? That's unpossible!" ~The Simpsons

If your father is a poor man, It is your fate but, If your father-in-law is a poor man, it’s your stupidity.

What is 10 years with me? Husband: A second. Wife: What is $1000 for me? Husband: A coin. Wife: Ok give me a coin. Husband: Wait a second!

The cops came to my house claiming my dog had chased someone on a bike. I told those idiots my dog doesn't have a bike.

My internet wasn't working yesterday... I think my neighbors forgot to pay the bill. How irresponsible of them.

“Let’s eat Grandma” or “Let’s eat, Grandma”- Punctuation saves lives.

Best breakup line ever: Boy: "Wanna see a magic trick?" Girl: "Sure." Boy: "POOF, you're single!"

Dear Heart {❤} , Please stop getting involved in everything. Your job is to pump blood, that's it...

One of the cooler things you can do when you die is be buried with an elephant bone, just to confuse future archaeologists.

Woman: “I made my husband a millionaire.” Her friend: ”And what was he b4 u married him? Woman: “A billionaire.”

Each Easter Eddie eats eighty Easter eggs

Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris' PC will crash.