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Just when you thought that the Epstein scandal was over, up pops the Slovenian whore with "It is nothing to do with me! Honest!" Donald will need to invade Iran again.... #melania #melaniatrump #epstein #epsteinfiles #epsteinclientlist

I love the interviews. It is where you find out that one wants to open a barber shop for turnips, one wants to go door-to-door brushing the teeth of parrots, and one is a multi-million business but that Scottish fella has bought his website. #theapprentice #apprentice

What is you opinion of Richard Madeley as a journalist? #gmb

Richard Madeley: "How did Steve Backshall recognise that they were the same two killer whales?" I think the fact that they are the last two is a bit of a hint. They weren’t a couple from out of town on their holiday Richard, you absolute tool. #gmb

Richard Madeley: "Why don't you put a chip in your cat so that you can track her?" Does he really think that a microchip in a cat has GPS?! What an absolute clown. #gmb

Richard Madeley: "You should be able to check a register to see if a car is allowed to have a blue badge or not" The badge relates to the person and not the car Richard, you utter pellet. #goodmorningbritain #gmb

Julia: "I didn't feel comfortable in my own skin" That'll be the Botox, love. #mafs #MAFSAU #MAFSAUS #MAFSAustralia

It is weird how some people look at these male 'influencers" and see uber-alpha males. I watched the documentary and all I saw was a bunch of spoilt gym bros with daddy issues.... #insidethemanosphere #manosphere #theroux #louietheroux

Some people believe Donald Trump's assertions that he did not sexually assault children on Epstein's island. Trump also claims to have a full head of hair and a natural tan. Do they believe that too?.... #Trump #epstein #IranWar #maga #donaldtrump #potus #OilCrisis2026

This is from the speech that was just made by the great orator Donald Trump, who apparently has insufficient self-awareness to realise that even interpreters think that he talks a load of absolute dogshit. #Trump #DonaldTrump #Americas #LatinAmerica

What has happened to the treats for the winning team? I always liked that bit when Lord Sugar was like: "You were fucking shit, but the other team were worse. Now, go on. Go trampolining." #theapprentice

I bet you all 50p that Touker can make these bags in China for seven dollars. 50p. #dragonsden

@curetowokeness Is that you, Lord Byron?

@FuzzyTellybox Keir Starmer is a wanker is a wanker Keir Starmer is a wanker is a wanker

Donald Trump just complained about the leadership of the UK, saying: "This is hardly Winston Churchill we are dealing with" Well you are hardly Barack Obama, but you don't hear us blubbling about it... #trump #Iran #IranWar #DonaldTrump #maga

*BREAKING NEWS* Donald Trump still doesn't understand how tariffs work. #trump #Iran #IranWar #DonaldTrump

Hey @BBCNews - I reckon that your spellcheck is on the fritz #bbc #bbcnews #cyrpus

Loving watching #thefloor I like how they inherit each other's specialist subject. Looking forward to the final, where a plasterer and a pig farmer need to name a load of pictures relating to the cloaca. Ace.

#Oilreserves by country: 1st: #Venezuela. Attacked by #trump and their leader was arrested on January 3rd 2026. 3rd: #Iran. Attacked by Trump and their leader is killed on 28th February 2026. 4th: #Canada. Trump has publicly wanted to annexe Canada for years. Careful, chaps.

The President of Peace has spoken. I bet the judges at @NobelPrize are kicking themselves. #Trump #maga #IranMassacre #IranRevoIution2026 #trumpiran

Start of the day: £49.99 a bunch. By the end they will be charging about shouting "FIFTY FUCKING PENCE" at startled-looking tourists. I bet you. #theapprentice #apprentice