MATTHEWOODSON / GSTKO GLOBAL®

Proof that dating apps trigger your lizard brain - I often swipe right on construction equipment rental ads without realizing.

I have officially entered the "use the arthritis-jar-opening-tool-thing to also turn the weed grinder" stage of life.

5 new art prints and more will be available in my shop tomorrow (Friday, December 3rd) at 12PM CDT! shop.gstko.com/category/new

Oh! Hello layer number 1700. You snuck up on me there. 😭

TOMORROW! My show ‘Anatomy of a Ruin’ opens from 6-9 at @roqlarue in Seattle ‘Valley of Chimes’ Conte on paper 16x16”

@tinymediaempire I really really really don't want to be pro Marky Mark / Sully.

i wish @ghostco lived closer so we could man-date this movie and have strong opinions.

listen, i'm a thousand percent on board with an UNCHARTED movie, they have my money already... but it almost feels like an unwinnable war, the games are these 15 hour gorgeous epic journeys with the kind of set pieces most films get maybe ONE of per film, every hour.

@justinbrookhart The employees at the Home Depot p̵a̵i̵n̵t̵ ̵c̵o̵u̵n̵t̵e̵r̵ wield an awful lot of influence over the quality of someone’s S̶a̶t̶u̶r̶d̶a̶y̶ life.

@michaelwconrad @makeawiesch @CullyHamner @Chloe_in_pink Your notes on making us BOTH Laurel and BOTH Hardy were equal parts cruel and amazingly accurate. Genius work!

@makeawiesch @CullyHamner @Chloe_in_pink @ghostco You hacking into my notes for the next book?

If you’ve read Double Walker— yes: Cully was named after @cullyhamner, and Chloe was named after @Chloe_in_pink. These are two of the beautiful and talented artists that welcomed me to Austin when I moved here a few years ago and was thinking about how to follow up Tremor Dose.

@feralcatbox I have found myself talking about my lawn a lot recently, even when I try not to. I'm terrified for what sort of future that might mean for me.

Entire phone calls about logistical nonsense - After spending dedicated months digging into him a bit & ask questions to get somewhere else, his interests, talking about other topics, & really getting nowhere - you just have to resign to weekly calls about the lawn, I guess.

Is your Boomer Dad coming to visit? Let’s talk on the phone about: - how many airmiles this costs - well if I check a bag, I’ll have to get there early because I’ll be parking in the extended stay lot -whether or not it will be rush hour (1/2)

@justinbrookhart @drancatore For what it’s worth, being 6’3” doesn’t help this problem either. They are lying to all of us.

@oliverbarrett I have become immune to the siren song of Drew Carey!

@ghostco We're goin' bowlin...

Over the last 20 years, the songs that I have had stuck in my head for more than 5 years at a time are Puff the Magic Dragon, and Moon Over Parma. Please pray for me, as I have woken up with Michael Jackson's Earth Song in my head everyday for a week straight.

@michaelwconrad Michael, I think I love you, but I also do not want to have sex with you. I am not sure what that means about my life and I am now very conflicted. Emotions that don’t involve my genitals are confusing and scary for me. (I hope you guys are safe and warm!)

This is what happens if you imply (without any indication of romance) that Wonder Woman cares Superman’s wellness enough to say she “loves” him. Members of our community are going through real life hardship (we lost power/water, we’re fine) meanwhile this guy with the threats.

As someone that is completely incapable of talking about my own work, it always feels like magic when someone is able to put words to it. Let alone, when they are able to do so evocatively and thoughtfully! Thank you for the kind words Chris!

Domestic terrorism: Violent, criminal acts committed by individuals and/or groups to further ideological goals stemming from domestic influences, such as those of a political, religious, social, racial, or environmental nature.

This morning my neighbor yelled at me from 200+ feet away for inadvertently scaring away a bird on my own property, because he had been “watching that bird all morning!”...

@justinbrookhart Thrown into a river on CHRISTMAS nonetheless. However, the Penguin is (apparently) 33 years old during the main events of Batman Returns. I feel like we all turned out pretty good, considering.