PleaseGetYourRest

May the 6th be with you.

What’s everyone’s favorite Big Bad Voodoo Daddy song?

What’s everyone’s favorite part of Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield? Mines the part where it’s like STARRRING. AT THE BLANK PAGE. BEFORE YOUUU. OPEN UP THE DIRTY WINNNNDOW

Dropping’ the brown Cosby kids in the Cleveland pool if ya know what I mean

3/7: I’m gonna take a shower now. Get my head right. Take the time to think about everything. I hope when I get out things are different. Because I know things could be so good for us if we just tried. If we just got notifications of tweets from one another. I really do love you

2/7: You don’t HAVE TO have notifications set for me but when we first got together and you said you would make sure you liked all my tweets and would retweet I thought it was real. But maybe I’m not enough for you. Maybe it’s all a joke. A facade. Cont’d

Starting to think you guys don’t have notifications set for when I tweet and that really bums me out. I do my best. I give it everything I got. And I feel like I’m talking to a wall sometimes. This isn’t how I thought it would be. It’s not how I thought we’d grow together. Cont’d

I dated Zendaya for about 8 months before she got together with Spider-Man 3 and she always said she hated spiders. Women are such liars sometimes. #spiders #PeterParker #PeterParkour #YouforyaHBO

Kissed a frog and instead of him turning into a prints. A zebra prints. #hot #sexy #hotnsexy #smut

Loved John Stamps as Uncle Jesse in Full House S1-S4 but when he started dating Rebecca you could tell he was just in it for the hot hook-ups and that’s not what Full House was about. #JohnStamps @JohnStamos

On Season 2 of Yo Mama and this show keeps getting better and better. A lot of good Yo Mama jokes

My bra size you ask? Silent B’s.

My nickname in highschool was BBB. Brandon Butter (B)Knife

Hey baby what do ya say we crack open a blue bottle of Mad Dog 20/20 and watch Shallow Hal?

My nickname in highschool was Deena the Schema!

THE BEST WAY I CAN BE THE ONE I CAN NEVER BELIEVE I WILL NEVER GET IT BACK FROM THE WORLD

Some days I still can’t believe I invented autotune.

My nickname in highschool was Uncle Mommy.

My nickname in highschool was Jimmby

Sorry just realized I won’t be able to swag surf this weekend. Forgot I made plans to drop down and get my eagle on.