Goose 🫶🏼

You ever think how silly you’d look taking a piss on a plane if the plane wasn’t there? Standing up at 30,000 feet doing 350mph with your dick out.

If your pillow looks like this, don't worry about hantavirus

@yuhasr55 @bobkillthebeatz @SafetyNotorious He didn’t fail basic English but your dumbass can’t think logically to save your life so…

@bobkillthebeatz @SafetyNotorious Did you all fail basic English? 🤦‍♂️

Frontier Airlines A321, Flight 4345, struck and killed a pedestrian on DEN Runway 17L last night during its takeoff roll. The person had just jumped the perimeter fence and ran onto the active runway. The individual was hit about two minutes later near the mid-field area, far from the terminal in the outer perimeter section. The crew aborted the takeoff near V1. A brief engine fire occurred due to ingestion, followed by smoke in the cabin. Everyone evacuated safely via slides, with 12 minor injuries reported. Officials say it was a deliberate trespass. This tragic incident raises serious security questions. The NTSB and FAA are investigating. Engine aftermath👇🏻

@EliseMenaker This was killer, well done!

The standard way to hold your glove is a thing of the past... Ian Happ shows me the hand positioning most guys use in MLB today:

Backstrom has to be one of the most underrated players of all time. I still don’t know how he got this pass through

@biryani_joey @airlinevideos You’re just an idiot

@airlinevideos Isn’t she a 757. Def not a 737

Wait for it! A United Boeing 737-900ER powers into a go-around right in front of our cameras in San Diego—so loud it set off car alarms in the parking garage! 🔊 All captured LIVE on Airline Videos Live on May 5th, 2026.

@Workday Fix your shit

The galaxy is vast, but your opportunity to join the greatest gathering of developers is closing in. #MaytheFourth Register here: w.day/3PfTeJ6

@luciegoosies Tell em babe

@markymrk720 @Turbinetraveler I hope you suddenly lose your job with barely a backup plan in the near future.

@Turbinetraveler This airline sucked so bad. Never had issues with allegiant or frontier but always with spirit. Glad to see them go bankrupt.

Here are the last ATC communications between the final Spirit Airlines flight to land, flight NK1833, and Dallas/Fort Worth Airport (KDFW) Tower.

@JimFerretti1976 @AlaskaAir Moron

Hey @AlaskaAir . Why am I standing at an empty check in in Reno at 3:30pm? I would like to get my bag on the flight? Bad look

@StevenProfB @AirCanada Oh nooooo what ever will you do

. @AirCanada just decided to separate my wife and me on our upcoming overseas flight. We had bought and paid for adjoining seats. Now, one week before departure, they notified me that they’re changing MY seat and moving me 12 rows back. No explanation, no apology. Unacceptable.

me: seattle has the world's longest floating bridge fiancé: *quizzical look* me: it additionally has both the 3rd and 5th longest floating bridges in the world fiancé: ...what? me: the problem is the lake to the west of the city is so deep that pylons for other bridge types could not be placed fiancé: …? me: esther perel posits that familiarity leads to the death of the erotic. it is in the gulf between two people, in the corners of their psyches unknown to one another, that eroticism may bloom. fiancé: *squints at me* me: i met someone from seattle today

Tornado warning? Nah, I’m warning the tornado

@luciegoosies Xao

Every time Trump’s poll numbers drop:

Hi please don’t vape around my baby. We’re raising him exclusively on Marlboro reds.

@FrescaEE @Buccigross Couldn’t have said it any better

@Buccigross Instead of just saying "we heard fans' complaints, and we've improved", you have to try to gaslight your audience and act like the audio has always been amazing? Come on, man.

Great audio by our ESPN audio folks! Love how you hear the puck hit the back bar inside the net. You can also hear JJ Moser scream "Yeah!!" before the crowd roars over my voice which is really cool. He knew first. These audio/visual people work 12-15 hours a day, traveling the country to bring games into your homes. They are my favorite co workers at ESPN. The best people.

@Buccigross Bros been reading the comment section

imagine smoking baby yoda like a brisket and covering him in sauces and seasonings

“One more french fry with lunch and that’s a homer” is an all timer from @JimDeshaies #Cubs