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I long for the day I don't have to endlessly shitpost on here about or have active concern for politics.

@TimmyHallRadio The best part of Harrison Ford shooting the guy with the sword in Raiders of the Lost Ark is it wasn't in the original script. He had been fighting a stomach bug and asked the producers something the effect of "can't I just shoot him?" They went with it.

@PoweNodl3614 @BlueJacketsNHL Troll as you might, the team has to stay in Columbus until at least 2039 unless all parties involved want to pay a fine equal to the GDP of some small countries.

@BlueJacketsNHL Enjoy it while it lasts. All roads lead to Quebec. The fans want it. The league wants it. Even the players want. Fantilli was rounding up the troops to get their passports ready. Finally every franchise in the NHL will have a rival and be relevant again! #CBJ #5thLine

THE BONES ERA CONTINUES 💥 We've signed Rick Bowness to a contract that will keep him with the club during the 2026-27 season! 📝 cbj.co/bowness-041626

@wydblaise I'm not sure there's a woman on Earth outside of porn who's talked more or longer about her nether regions to stay relevant.

Amy Schumer revealed that in her prime she usually called men to go down on her and sends them off after because men also do that to ladies “At my peak, I called a professional athlete to go down on me and I told him to leave after, happened a couple times”

@Hunter_Wofford I was there and it was 5,000 degrees at 9am. I wore sandals in the hopes of keeping my feet cool and it, uh, didn't work.

hell yeah, 9am EST nascar

@Aportzline @AccountantDan I'd love to know who the granola bar player was.

@AccountantDan Ha!

The Athletic: Portzline | #CBJ coach Rick Bowness spoke for Blue Jackets fans when he torched his players after Tuesday’s season-ending loss to #ALLCaps nytimes.com/athletic/71984…

@qcapital2020 The Beginning of the Bullshit. 11 years later, here we are.

Still one of the funniest videos of all time

Trump laying out his strategy for the Stait of Hormuz

@_slek9 There can't be much of a coincidence that they started winning more, and more consistently, after he left.

Laine perpetuated the problem. He was low effort and disinterested during his time in Columbus. Was he wrong? No. Did he have a right to make a comment about it? No. #CBJ

@seth_walters1 @JFreshHockey CBJ didn't blow a 12 point cushion on the bubble. 😅

@JFreshHockey A good reminder that CBJ takes the cake for biggest late season choke — DET is off the hook, right? 😅

@NHLGM1 @jakemalasek First goal was in DC against Columbus.

@jakemalasek First goal was there. Only fitting his last one will be too

There’s just no way Alex Ovechkin’s last NHL game is in fucking Columbus, Ohio.

@F1RETHECANNON What was the cheer at the end of the game? ESPN is currently watching Ovie strip in the locker room.

The players take a lap for the fans amidst a smattering of boos. #cbj

The audio of the last minute of the season being blocked because of the emergency alert system talking about a tornado warning the next county over seems fitting. #CBJ

@nascarman_rr @SethEggert91 Wasn't it even on Saturday because they didn't want it on the same day of the week as the 500?

My TED Talk: The decline in the Brickyard 400 is mainly due to the vanity of IMS themselves. In the 90s-00s, they restricted the infield crowds for the Brickyard just so the 500 could stay as the biggest race attendance. They wouldn't sell infield general admission. The 500 thrives because it's a party with many people who just go to drink and dont care about the race. The Brickyard never got a chance to grow that party atmosphere, and therefore, the crowd was much more tied to the racing quality. They had a chance to plant the seeds for an event that could become an annual party and they blew it.

And “marketed”/presented/positioned precisely as such to the Conniver in Chief. “Indisputably world’s largest airline” and “a -true- American flagged carrier” and “once in an lifetime” and “a monumental move that will be historic”— that kind of dumbed-down lickspittle claptrap custom-honed to appeal to the arch-building, monument destroying dictatorial instincts of him would be my theory.

@Aportzline Who is "she"?

Tonight marks the first time in #CBJ Charlie Coyle's NHL career - 1,032 games - that he'll play a game of no consequence. "I wish she could do some stuff over, but you can't, so ... I have an NHL game to play. So we have to be men about it, and I'm ready to play and win a game."

@ScottMcCann21 I got turned off turn 2 on my first ever lap at Talladega because somebody couldn't drive straight and slid most of the way down the backstretch on my roof. About a month later, I got dumped for 6th at USA International in a late model and cancelled my subscription.

I'm so fucking over iRacing. I'm done with this shit

@CouchRacerShop There are, without a doubt, at least a few Chase fans who hated Jeff Gordon for allegedly being handed everything. Chase now drives what used to be the 24.

Imagine being a diehard Dale Jr fan and complaining that Ty Gibbs is a silver spoon kid. Chase Elliott fans don’t have much room to talk either. Please tell us which bad rides he had to drive on his yellow brick road to Cup.

So, a couple of the boys have been texting me: “Why the hell would Trump drop the Hormuz blockade bomb on a Sunday? It’ll send oil screaming past $120, maybe $130 if the algos really panic. Makes zero sense if you actually want cheaper barrels.” But it makes perfect sense. Beautiful, even. See, Tokyo and Hong Kong are already humming by the time the East Coast is still nursing its coffee. Those futures pits—Dow, S&P, the whole equity complex, plus Brent and WTI on the screens—never really sleep. You’ve got fourteen, fifteen hours of runway before the New York bell. Plenty of time for the right hands to lean in: long the indices in Hong Kong, short the crude in Tokyo, riding the fear wave as the blockade tweet lights up every terminal from Singapore to Sydney. Then, right on cue, before the U.S. opens, comes the pivot. Something about “there’s regime change in Tehran,” “we can do business,” “Talks were Good,” the usual art-of-the-deal baloney. Markets whip around like they’ve been Tasered. Oil gives back the spike, stocks rip higher. The boys in Asia unwind clean, pocket the spread. A few hundred million, maybe more, conjured out of thin air on the back of one perfectly timed Sunday morning post. Not bad for a morning’s work. The Street’s been running these kinds of games for decades: information, timing, leverage. Just never quite so… presidential!!

@mark_scheig How can you call it a goal on ice and not force it to a review either in the war room or via Montreal challenge?

How was that goalie interference? #CBJ

HOW THE HELL DO YOU CALL IT A GOAL AND THEN GO "SIKE LOL"? Shouldn't it be reviewed to see if it can be overturned either by Toronto or via challenge? #CBJ