JimTreks

I lived in Louisville, Kentucky when I was a kid. I was born there, though my parents weren't from there. My parents just happened to be living there for work. We moved to Michigan right before I started fifth grade. I remember thinking that I would miss my friends from Kentucky, but I didn’t. I forgot about them just about as quick as we left. I even remember realizing at the time, or a few months later how little I cared. Or how I just stopped thinking about them. Maybe I had a fleeting, "I wonder what Andrew is doing?" But that was it. I don’t think I was that weird, I think I just had a brother and sister and a mom and dad that I loved and liked - those are sometimes different - and friends just didn’t matter that much to me. I think friends are good and friends are fine. Who doesn't? But I wonder if we inflate their importance or an idea of them. I wonder if it's kids who inflate or the parents who are doing it. I don't know. I remember there were those kids who brought friends along on family trips. We were not one of those families. I wouldn't have even asked. The answer would have been a laugh from my dad. I can't really put my finger on it, but there were kids who seemed to care about friends too much. They were too impressionable, they were too easily swayed, they were kind of weird to me. It felt like somewhere they would throw their family under the bus for the sake of their friends. We fought, we had arguments, we didn't have a Hallmark card family, but looking back I realize we were very very close and that we loved each other very very much. Or maybe the reason I didn't miss those classmates didn't have to do with my family but with the fact that kids are just kind of along for the ride in life. Kids are oddly, sometimes better at rolling with the punches than we adults are. We get hung up, they live in the present. Maybe I didn't miss my friends because I was just excited to be in a new place that was pretty cool. There was the big lake, Lake Michigan, and I couldn't believe how big it was. It wasn't like the muddy lake we had gone fishing on in Kentucky. There were waves. We visited one time before we moved. We were down at the beach in the evening a little bit before sunset. I think it was a Sunday. Or maybe it wasn't, maybe it just felt like a Sunday. But I remember playing in the waves, and running on the sand, and having a hard time believing that we were actually going to live here someday. I couldn't believe it. It felt so cool. Maybe that was it, or maybe that played a role. When you are moving to a place like it's easy to get excited. Nevertheless, I didn't miss my friends for long. I don't even remember most of their names. When we left Kentucky I didn't want to go back. I didn't wish we stayed. I've repeated this process a few times in my life, as have you I am sure. I don't really talk with too many people I knew in college. Barely anyone from high school. Maybe one and barely ever. A long time ago I deleted Facebook and all my "friends" with it. I said, "If they want to get ahold of me they'll call or text." Some did, most didn't. I didn't call either. We weren't really friends. I moved away and away again and most have no idea where I am or what I do and I have no idea where they are or what they do, and that feels completely right. Life moves on, people come and go, friends fade into our life and then out of it. We are all just sort of passing through, crossing paths when we do. Except family; blood. That lingers and that stays. None of this is sad, though I think some people think it is. Or maybe I am weird, or cold, or independent, or solitary, or cynical, but I don't think I am - I am an optimist! - and I don't think any of it is sad. Life is an adventure, we can live many lives in one.