KELETCHEE

🌊 Think the ocean is just water and waves? Think again. The deep sea is darker than space, colder than your freezer, and home to things nightmares are made of. A THREAD 🧵

@UseaONE 💔😂

@KELETCHEE No remind me Abeg 😭

And United didn’t buy Joao Neves because of physicality 🤡

@Lea_EFC @KELETCHEE

Drop your handle and my followers will follow you 🙌

@MarmoushEra So Gerard is not a premier league great?

🚨BREAKING: Jamie Carragher on Bruno Fernandes “He’s a very good player, no doubt. But ‘Premier League great’? That word gets thrown around far too easily these days. I understand he has done well in his Manchester United career but when you look at players who have done it at the top level he can’t be mentioned. The greats we talk about carried teams to titles. That’s the difference. Stats alone don’t put you in that category. Even if he beats the assist record he won’t still be a PL great until he wins the league”.

@Abuolododo12 @PoojaMedia He has 2 throphies with Portugal alone you dummy

@PoojaMedia Bruno is overrated He has only two careers trophies to his name 😂 Enzo Fernandez is better than him and I'm ready to d!e on this

Bruno Fernandes winning the Best player in the Premier League will be a stain on the efforts of Gabriel, Declan Rice, O'Reilly & Haaland if they win the league. #PoojaDissects

@Adikastakes Make una start that Curtis jones for right back against United

My Premier League TOTW for Gameweek 34!

@UgochukwuCFR She didn’t even insult anyone It’s just football bants You don’t even know her in a personal level to suggest that about her

People: “I’m sure there are many Nigerian female football content creators, but Victor Osimhen chose to take a Ghanaian female football content creator to watch a live match at Galatasaray.” The “many female football content creators”: 👇 She doesn’t even understand how remarkable it is for retired players (Henry and Özil) to be in the top four alongside players who are still active.” Henry set this record in 2003 (23 years ago, likely before she was even born), left premier league in 2007 (19 years ago), retired in 2014 (12 years ago) and is still ranked top 2 most assists in 2026 and you think it’s a joke or mean feat to attain? The way some of you downplay people’s outstanding achievements just to score cheap points in the name of “football banter” is disgraceful. And it’s always people whose only achievement in life is being a social media content creator.

@FabrizioRomano @dan_norseman Good one, now find a good athletic partner for him in the summer

🚨✍🏿 Kobbie Mainoo 2031: here we go. ✅

@ESPNUK There was nothing like ‘ open play ‘ assists talk until it got to a United player’s turn

Bruno Fernandes is set to break the Premier League assist record for a single season 👀: Kevin De Bruyne: 20 assists 🅰️ 17 from open play Thierry Henry: 20 assists 🅰️ 20 from open play Bruno Fernandes: 19 assists 🅰️ 10 from open play

@kletlape Always a warm up before the back squats And also relives some of that back strain you get from the back squat

I love a good front squat

@LASHYBILLS He didn’t pay for it so 🤷🏽‍♂️

A mother forced her son to slam his PS5 the same way he had slammed her pet cat.

@Ayoelesho What if he sleeps with 3 women a day

If he sleeps with one woman a day, it will take him 31 years and 6 months to sleep with 11,500 women. He is 45 years old. This is only possible if he started sleeping with at least one woman a day before he turned 14 years old. Nobody can keep up with that streak. He’s lying.

@Afc_Nels2 Did you see any wrestling in the box ?

Now that it’s not Arsenal. Corner kick goals are so beautiful to you mutants yeah?😂😂

@oluwaDanielmii So he shouldn’t move on with his life after what happened ? What is wrong with some of you?

See in this life, just don't die. People will move on. This same guy cried on social media and said he would retire from boxing forever. Now he's coming back. Human beings are just like the weather. They'll change at every given opportunity

@NorraWilbor If you Look well you’ll the both defenders looking towards Mbuemo that means they were expecting Bruno to pass to him , Bruno made the right decision by not passing to him

I still insist.. Why didn’t Bruno make the pass to Mbeumo instead?? He was very clear and would have scored as well. It would have been a big booster for him. Look how isolated Mbeumo has become lately. A shadow of himself! Mbeumo cannot end the season feeling this way please.

@TheLifeOfMide @iam_douglax Guyyy 😂

@iam_douglax @KELETCHEE see fatality

😭

@toyin81 @RAWFOOTBALLHD @footbolmatter10 Big , strong thighs

@KELETCHEE @RAWFOOTBALLHD @footbolmatter10 Dinho has a very very strong thigh.

NEYMAR VS RONALDINHO 1V1 FACE-OFF: WHO WINS? FT @footbolmatter10

@VicksonLFC And Bruno doesn’t have a trophy?

Every elite midfielder has a trophy to back up their greatness. But we should look away because Uncle Bruno plays for almighty Manchester United I promise you, No stone will be left untouched

@LFCPRAISE Till Sunday

Oml I go beat this Man U, who go follow you play this end to end Bs?😂😂😂

@DanielDtrader @agberofc_ He wasn’t good enough at that time simple

@KELETCHEE @agberofc_ Because he wasn’t given the opportunity just like salah, you fool. 1assist in 3 appearances is a better stat anywhere

Look at the team KDB inherited and made great. Look at the one Bruno inherited, but they want to gaslight FT twitter that KDB was in a better team.