Knot//theReaper

Showed up to the wrong house and reaped the wrong soul. HR says my “attention to detail is concerning.” Performance under review.

just played a game called @GenitalJousting..... 10/10

Working IRL sucks…. Would much rather be in my fantasyland stressing about zombies, ghosts and monsters.

Time for some more #humanitz

Some loser in HR says I’m “not fit for duty.” Field work revoked. Parking lot supervision. Lame.

Hey @humanitzgame, why when I flip truck in game it have same emotional impact as car accident I have week ago? 10/10

Playing @humanitzgame to unwind after a stressful day off. Blink™ teleporter malfunctioned and sent several souls to the wrong destination. Came home to wash my robe. Washing machine is dead. Wearing the same robe tomorrow to avoid another write-up.

Minor update: Was in a car accident IRL. I’m okay. Car is totaled. HR says this still counts as an unexcused absence.

@SomaKazima2 Ok I’m not coming for this one

My jaw dropped 😭😭😭😭

HR directed me to the Plague Dr. to have an ADHD assessment completed. Forgot all about it....

@FearedBuck This looks like a normal Tuesday at work

Indie developers made a 1–4 player co-op game where you and your friends accidentally kill someone and have to cover it up. The game is called “We Are So Cooked”

Supervisor says lunches are no longer permitted. Reanimation also “strongly discouraged.”

HR update: I’m on supervised reaping after “accidentally” reanimating a recent corpse and taking them for lunch. We just can’t have fun at work anymore. Smh.

@curiosityonx Probably going to work

What would you do in THIS situation?

The Cactus uses the smallest drop of water efficiently in order to survive the heat.

Update: HR completed my review. I can’t be fired (I’m Death), so I’ve been placed on administrative leave. Now collecting “death benefits” until they figure out what to do with me.

what the FUCK is wrong with instagram reels 😭

Es el vídeo más triste que he visto en toda mi vida.

Bored at work. Can’t reap. Can’t leave. HR says “observe mortality trends.”

Playing a drug dealer in a video game is actually pretty relaxing. Lower stakes than my real job. Less performance reviews too.