Luvutse L

@highwaine @KijanayaKabras 😂😂😂😂😂😂I thought heard my own things Maaahn hio jina ni ya kitambo😂😂😂😂

@KijanayaKabras Noi wewe 😂😂😂😂😂😂

Mimi ni tajiri boss sio Kama wewe, Kuja nikuajiri kazi malaya wewe Nipige risasi malaya wewe Ata Wacha nipigie Ruto 😂😂😂🙌

@gtfudan 😂😂😂😂😂

Amempea za kuingia sugoi under 2hrs

@UTDqueen 😂😂😂😂😂

Ni kama mtapigania nchi peke yenu kiasi ju family yetu iko busy sai. Tunatafuta dem mwenye ametext my 75 yr old grandfather ati ' hey handsome '

@king_luth3r @WillieOeba @Annitajoe1 😂😂😂😂😂naishaaa

@WillieOeba @Annitajoe1 Sura ni ya mkenya roho ni ya muisraeli.

Mnakuwanga selfish sana. The employed wananiita kwa lavish hotel after work hours 7-10 pm. Ni travel from Nakuru kuperfom for passion. Msiniite ka hamnikanji !!

@Wangechike_ 😂😂😂😂

Can we hire them for protests?

@wanjiiru_ML 😂😂😂😂

Nimeambia Mathee mm staki watoto akaanza kulia,,sahi nangoja amalize kulia nimwambie nko na mtu na mimi ndiye bwanaaa 😂😂😭💔

@Urunzii 😂😂😂😂😂

My sister after enlisting me to be her next of kin & custodian of her kids. Politeness is a myth.

@k_laus1 😂😂😂😂

Car manufacturers should also put horns on the side of passengers seat, we also have friends to greet

@AtworiYa 😂😂😂😂

Hii siku Bibi ya PLO Lumumba alikataa kumpigia pasi akaamua asonge na dress yake ya kuoga...😂

@farhiiiyaaa___ @Annitajoe1 😂😂😂

When the Conductor finally gives me back my change and I can freely look out the window nifikirie mambo zingine sasa in peace

@mts__kid 😂😂😂

Binti kiziwi ukifunika masikio utapona kweli?

@weak_spell @Brianmbunde 😂😂😂

Kenyans tomorrow night trying to locate that moon🤣🤣

@SwahiliOz @NelsonHavi 😅😅😅

@NelsonHavi Tell her not to worry her pretty head, you won’t be elected.

You never understand a woman until to raise one. This one (named after my mother) asked that we oil her hair as I tell her what I will do for her generation if she votes for me. I remember the last time I oiled hair was for my mother. I must have been 10 years old and her 30 years young.

@brian_tafari @Ochorakot 😂😂😂😂

@Ochorakot Sieeet! Next time usifanye tukose matanga.....

Leo asubuhi mngekua mnatweet RIP Ochora. Jana jioni hapo around 6pm niliona kifo na macho buana. But I managed to escape but my friends walikua injured seriously. So as always mmekua mkisema nimenona sana. So I have been doing some walks around Juja. So jana nikaamua kupiga marounds na marafiki kwa abandoned places around Juja. Before ufike Mangu High School, kuna rail way line. Me and my friends we decided to follow it ndio itutoe na Juja South then tulink na Sewage ndio mimk nirudi kwangu Gate A. Along the way we noticed alot of strange things buana. Hakuna watu wanapita hapo apart from us 3 na mathe fulani tulipatana na yeye akilima shamba. Place kulikua karibu na inakaa watu wanaishi ilikua estate fulani inaitwa Adams Estate. Strange thing ni ati makeja zilikua zimejengwa fiti but hakuna waseee wanaishi hapo buana. So boys wangu mmoja akanotice hiyo redflag but nikainsist tukaendelea kuingia kuenda nani tukifuata railway. Watu tulipatana nao wa kwanza walikua mavijana wawili mmoja mwenye nakumbuka alikua amevaa jacket ya Red. Wakatuona na mbali alafu wakapotea. Tukajoke about it tukisema maybe juu tuko watatu wameogopa wakatuhepa. Tukiendelea kutembea boys wangu Pato akaokota screen protector ya simu. Kidogo kidogo tukaona kiatu moja ya dem kusonga mbele kuna nguo zilikua zimeraruriwa na zinakaa zilikua za dem but hatukua sure. The more tunaendelea kutembea the more vitu strange tulipata. Mara sijui kofia mara jacket. Mara crocs. Imagine with all those red flags we kept moving with confidence. Until kwa kona fulani majamaa wawili wakatokea kighafla. Mwene alikua amevaa jacket ya red alitusalimia "Wozaaaa" before niseme woza back niliona panga ikiwa imebebwa juu akisema tukae chini. Mimi damu ilifreeze buana sikua hata na nguvu ya kuresist buana. Kwa maisha yangu sijai bebewa panga hivo buana. Nilikaa tu chini bila kupinga hapo nikijiambia nkitoka hapo alive ni Mungu. Boys wangu Pato alipita na huyo mwingine mwenye alikua na kisu. Alpha boys wangu alipigwa panga ya mgongo live live. But wao walikua strong so waliretaliate wakatoka mbio. Hao wakora wakanisahau juu mimi already nilikua nishaakaa chini. Wakaanza kukumbiza Alpha na Pato mbio. Kuniacha kidogo nilitoka mbio bila kuangalia nyuma. Nilikimbia hata mimi sikuamini venye nimenona hivo naweza toka na hiyo speed. Nilikimbia until nikafika kwa ule mathe alikua analima. Alikua ashatoka kulima so alikua anatembea kuenda home. Nikamshow kuna wezi. Akatoka mbio akaniacha hapo nyuma juu hata sikua na nguvu. Akanitegea karibu na hapo Adams Estate. Akaniambia nipigie hao marafiki zangu simu kama hawashiki tuende police station. Aliniambia hapo watu huwa wanauliwa adi wanatupwa kwa quarry. Akaniambia hata last week kuna head teacher aliuliwa akatupwa huyo. Sijai pata trauma hivo. Nilipigia Pato akasema wako safe ni Alpha alikua ameumizwa kidogo juu walimkata na panga kwa mkono buana na walimtoka Iphone 13 pro max yake. Ilibidi tumepeleka kijana hosi ashughulikiwe mbio. Hamkusema bill ya hosi zinakuanga expensive hivo buana. Pato naye aliacha slides huko buana. Jana usiku sikulala buana. All my mind imekua vile nilimanage kuhepa hapo buana. Kama si Pato alijaribu kuretaliate sahii mngekua mnachanga za bill ya hosi ama matanga. Mungu apewe sifa

@Son_of_Laikipia 🤭🤭🤭🤭

Mheshimiwa

@Kamau266 😂😂😂😂

Kubook trip ni ya ndege hii ni kukata tikiti.

@amos_dulex 😅😅😅

Me wondering why the ugly guy at the corner of the club is looking at me nonstop, only to realize it's my dad😂😭

@Brianmbunde 😂😂😂😂😂😂

@Sincyyyyy_ 😂😂😂😂

Fun fact: a blue whale's anus can stretch to approximately 3 and a half feet, making it the second largest arsehole on the planet, after Sakaja

@dexxe 😂😂

so we are not safe from those attacks?