mr. rev. lord big fat keister 🇵🇸

Hey guys so I decided I don’t like having consequences for my actions so from now I’m going to do whatever I want and not face any repercussions. So if you could just let me do my thing that would be great and if you don’t that’s illegal and you’ll go to jail :)

@kingv0nstan Beautiful knockers ma’am!

Hitting the town 💃🏼

@punishedgarage Oh I’m so happy and in love woohoo women don’t want me and fish fear me

my bf mentioned that he likes a good frosty beer so i got him a nice sturdy glass mug he can put in the freezer as an early christmas present and he used it tonight and had a big ol beer foam mustache and it was really cute and i love him so much !!!

the lion does concern himself actually

@PowerPointPete Alternatively: yeer

I bet this shit hits hard if you're stupid as fuck

@jjcmor1 Skank

THE STREAK IS OVER!!!!!!!!!!! Detroit ends their 81-game, professional sports historic losing streak with a 25-14 win over Pittsburgh

I think I should be legally allowed to slap any elected official as hard as I can

Very few things I love more than my girlfriend, BattleBots, monster trucks, and pickles

@boymayor420 WACK

@LordKeister and he Definitely cant skate transitions 🙄

Kendrick’s disses are wild but this guy did it first

@vandevenesque You absolute buffoon. Were “barmaids” pulling terrible pours before woke happened?

@boymayor420 I’m not sure

alright im in nyc. what does this mean for black and white remakes

If I ever start talking about buying a Honda element… just know the time has come for me to be institutionalized

$100 for each duck. $25 for the gay one twitter.com/Yoda4ever/stat…

They should build more inhabited bridges this shit goes hard

Slow day at work means I’m sending tweets at unemployed levels

tfw you realize you accidentally said the quiet part extremely loud

It’s times like these that I wish I knew how to krump