Jake

stabbing myself in the stomach repeatedly and screaming REAL NOT CAKE

Why would anyone post a picture of them on the concrete in Chicago

surely 13 drinks and too much nicotine will improve my mood

@Puppieslover Wow even the seatbelt changed color

2009 2025

hate when somebody pulls up to a stop sign before me and waves me through. who the fuck do you think you are? you don’t get to decide. those aren’t the rules. fuck you

I’ll never ask a girl her body count because I’d likely commit murder suicide

midwest sober (only get black out drunk 2-3 times per week)

i genuinely act like this about everything in my daily life

i don't think it should be legal to interact with me

Small business owners get sooo pissed when you crash your car into their store

If you’re driving behind me and I see you have a handicap sign in your car I’m definitely brake checking you every 30 seconds just to see if you’re actually retarded

@GilbertPimbury @futt_buckerson @NFL_DovKleiman Quit looking at my toes you freak

@LoverTomi @futt_buckerson @NFL_DovKleiman Just from your toes I can tell you have nasty gyno

This is genuinely insane

@futt_buckerson @NFL_DovKleiman Yeah? And I’m down 20 lbs this year loser 😭

@LoverTomi @NFL_DovKleiman I know you're pasty

telling the mailman to stay the fuck away from my family

@rampagepoker ?

I’m ready for a fun night of poker

@ModReflexion How does this affect lebrons legacy

🚨 ÚLTIMA HORA: Algunos astrofísicos ahora teorizan que nuestra galaxia, la Vía Láctea, se desplaza en espiral por el espacio a 600 kilómetros por segundo, al mismo tiempo que oscila sobre su eje, como si batiera sus alas como una mariposa a través del cosmos.

@ESPN_Schick @HuskerMBB Great tweet

Scenes from the Schick house. The kids (and wife) were going through it in Charlotte.