Winfield Scott

The day I turned 5, and I was wondering why I was such a loser. Why did God give me awful parents? Why didn't I have a girlfriend? Will I have to go to Nam?

Me, in about 10 minutes. ⬇️

I see "Egyptian King" trending and think I'm gonna see some cool shit with pyramids, papyrus, and the lost library at Alexandria. I clicked on it and it's about some soccer player that everyone's all worked up over. 🫤

@ghobubo I know you've seen this,but watch it again. It's too hilarious!

@RonSonic @anarimafornow Well, he wasn't coughing last week, but I came in Monday, and he can't go 2 minutes without coughing. Same today. I don't know that COPD comes on suddenly.

@LtGenScott @anarimafornow Or maybe he has COPD or some other entirely noncontagious condition.

One of my bosses (I have 2) has been hacking wheezin' yesterday and today. He's CLEARLY sick. Yet, he comes in, works a full day here, exposing the rest of us to whatever it is he's got. I've know MANY OTHERS like him. It's like people get off on getting other people sick. It's either that or the height of ignorance and arrogance.

In the post-WW2 world, we haven't been very good at repairing/replacing our roads and bridges, but usually, if it's clearly a vital road or a bridge, we DO hop on it and get it done in a short time. The Key Bridge wasn't decorative. It was a heavily used major artery around Baltimore. I live about 90 miles from it and I can't believe that we've more or less abandoned rebuilding it. THE most culpable person in all this would be the Governor of Maryland. Why doesn't he give a damn about it?

Law enforcement helicopters hovering close to my workplace the last couple hours. If these are my last tweets, just know that I had a good life. No regrets. Wait. They seem to be moving away. So much for a great closing tweet!! 🙁

@DanClarkSports I like this version just a little bit better. 🙂

What do you think about the leaked Orioles City Connect jerseys?

My dad was a bouncer in a trampoline factory.

They should sell jerseys with the names in Velcro. Change 'em whenever you want. Don't have to buy a whole new jersey.

@anarimafornow He worked at a liquor store which didn't help. He also - during the same time - worked as an apartment complex "super." The guy who would fix shit. He could fix anything except cars. He kind of stayed away from cars and just let mechanics fix ours.

@LtGenScott That's sad. I'm sorry. Those are the people usually the most certain that they can handle it.

Going by the graphic alone... Men's look in the 60s. Women's look in the 70s.

@anarimafornow Alcohol was a big part of the problem. He might've been a half decent guy if he'd have stayed away from the sauce. He was an "ugly drunk."

@LtGenScott I do recall that he was not a strong contender for Father of the Year.

@anarimafornow The irony of that episode was how much HE beat his OWN wife! And here he is, trying to stop "conjugal violence" (for lack of a better word). Maybe the fact that they teamed up on him was karma.

@LtGenScott For real.

@anarimafornow His one act of goodness went wrong. One night, he was sitting on the front porch. Summer time. A young guy/girl couple is having a fight in the street! It turns physical. He goes to break it up, and they BOTH turn on HIM!! No good deed goes unpunished.

@LtGenScott 😅

@anarimafornow There was little good about him! But he could be funny. The craziest combination of evil and goofiness. Around 1974 or so, I remember him growing a beard and it came in mostly black. He would play with it and say, "I am a Cubano!!" There wasn't a speck of Latino in him!

@LtGenScott 😂 So there's one good thing about him.

@anarimafornow The 70s guy gives me flashbacks to my father.

@LtGenScott 50s and 60s. 😂

Provably untrue. Theoretically, a couple living is Key West could retire to Fort Lauderdale and be guilty of retiring "up north." But even in the broader sense, little Delaware is getting a heck of a lot of attention as a retiree destination. Specifically, Sussex County, which has 24 miles of ocean beach, and growing beach towns like Lewes, Dewey Beach, Fenwick Island, & Bethany Beach. Winters ARE cold, but it's not like North Dakota cold or New England cold. And you don't have 5 months of oppressive heat & humidity like you do in the Southeast.

@guy_herbert @JamesLucasIT Two words: white hats

@LtGenScott @JamesLucasIT One word: walking.

This is a New York City newsstand in the 1930s Genuine question: why no overweight people?

Can I get a witness!?!

The "gotcha" problem for Gen X is, you proudly point to how YOU were raised, but it was YOU who raised Millennials and GenZers! YOU had a hand in participation trophies, no-punishment child rearing, and the rest of it.