Mark Deeks

I have joined Threads to provide some confused-middle-aged-man-struggles-with-the-internet energy. So, which way around the board do the pieces go? Do you get anything for passing Go? @markdeeks" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noopener">threads.com/@markdeeks

Actually, ignore that, it's going quite well this. Really bodes well for the rest of the tournament.

IDEA: Third-place playoff to be held immediately after the final. Everyone filing out the stadium as the game kicks off, people packing away during the first half, only sound in the stadium is the hoover being run round the terraces. Could do it in a pub car park.

@hughlaurie Bollocks

fuck

Can I swear? This feels swearable, honestly. No? Right, ok. Well in that case, I am spiffing well miffed off.

Just once. Just one time, to watch a major tournament victory with family. Only one. Oh well.

Also think the ref's having a belter. Knows there will be stank, mostly allows it, but knows also where the line is and when it is crossed.

Proper effing game of football, this. Huge fan. Saka for Rogers, this is the perfect Saka game, but otherwise wouldn't change a thing. Bring it home.

@greaso There is.

People talk a lot about Noni Madueke not having a right foot, but they often neglect to mention that he doesn't have a left foot, either.

@street_trashed @Richard94671156 Wasn't nothing. Young gun was definitely on the way out. But he ain't now!

@Richard94671156 i hope he feels better. it's possible with the heat, yeah. i just don't want all of this to have been a waste of time or like i was making something out of nothing. we have a bunch of cats around here so i didn't want them to get him. or for him to walk in the road & get smushed.

bruce the wildlife rescue man took jeremy in on his farm. he had lots of animals. he grabbed jezza so easily to check for broken wings and legs. nope. he drank from the sink tap and it turns out he was just so hungry and thirsty. he couldn't fly because he had no energy! (1/2)

...oh.

Just a few hours left for Khris Middleton to sign an extension and avoid free agency. The most the Mavericks can offer him is a four year, $208,834,639 pact that runs through 2030, but Middleton may be wanting to see what he can get on the open market instead.

@JonesOnTheNBA Appropriately chaotic

England going crazy. Making it worth you staying up @MarkDeeksNBA 🤣

One of the best post-match interviews you will EVER see! Rest up, Harry :)

Might need a fair old splodge of that Factor 50 if we're sending England and Norway to Miami in July

Beautiful time to be English. Winston Churchill, fish and chips, Prince William, Wonderwall, fallen empires, crumpets, Factor 50 sun cream, Jude Bellingham, we've got it all.

@mattycanuck430 And there's me thinking I couldn't be happier

Now over to Harry Kane for a quick interview

Never a sodding penalty, that.

Oh you have to stay up until 4am to watch us lose in the World Cup against Mexico? Yeah well I would stay up until 5am to watch JamesOn Curry play for four seconds at a time and watch the Kings play three power forward lineups. Miss me with it. (Medal rescinded, but worth it.)

I have managed not to do any gatekeeping about the fact that my whole country is doing its nut at staying up to 2am for this one-off England game, and frankly I deserve a medal.

@JonesOnTheNBA His game is also built for aging well.

I think Damian will have one of the best Achilles recoveries ever because he didn’t rush back early and was very very diligent in his recovery process. He’s in incredible shape right now.