Matt Chisling

WITHOUT GOOGLING name a famous historic battle

If you supported the party that's at war with doctors (and not just ours, like, all doctors and medicine around the world), you might have won last night, but we are all going to lose as a result of that decision. You as well.

NBC… ya doing good things tonight 🥵

@caitalopram And yet my text is left on R!!!!!

how I feel being the irl Steve Kornacki to my theater friends

America, the election is almost here. Here’s what to expect when polls close: The margins are going to be close, but our campaign is on track to win this election. Americans all across the country are casting their votes in record numbers, ready to turn the page. It will take time to count every vote, and there may be swings in the count along the way. Donald Trump falsely claimed victory in 2020, and we expect that he will do it again. We know that he is a liar—but the ballots will tell the truth. Stay patient, and know that every vote will be counted fairly. America’s election system is strong—and it will not be interfered with by partisan actors. Our legal operation is ready to fight to protect every vote and make sure every last one is counted. Your vote is your voice, so get out and make yours heard: IWillVote.com. Together, we are going to win this election, and chart a new way forward.

I hate gay Halloween, what do you mean you watched The Traitors back in January and have been waiting 9 months to pull of a #TraitorJoes couple costume??

@paciorettys Ok wait what??? Wait til you find out that MB and I are buddies also???

my amazing boyfriend invested in sunset boulevard so we are here celebrating opening night and WHO!!! is in front of me but none other than matty fresh himself my glauma (glee trauma) never ends

Hello police, I’d like to report a murder.

@GrantGinder Oh I’m seated.

I have just finished the first draft of a new novel. I don't know if it's any good. I only know that I'm proud that the first lines of dialogue are this:

All night he talked about himself and about her. She, by contrast, talked about you. Because that’s who she works for.

Correct answer:

This cameo is gonna slap

Ok, hear me out SNL

This will appeal to tens of people on the net but:

Joe’s ready for his BRAT summer

If you recognize this piece of clothing, you’re as gay (and as old) as I am.

@codyandrusnyc She is gone, but she used to could've been ours.

We were ROBBED

There is literally not one morning that @MTA uptown A trains travel without delay on a weekday. Not one.

@joeycsims excuse me a revival WHERE

a revival of Mr. Burns? but we’re just LIVING Mr. Burns these days! amiright