Matt 🇬🇧

All very well. But when it was the Tories having to deal with the hard-left resident doctors’ leaders, Labour pols like Wes Streeting said a deal could be reached if only the Tory government negotiated with them properly. So what’s the excuse for no deal now?

An Irish bloke goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, it's me arse, I'd like you to take a look, if you could?" So the doctor gets him to drop is pants and takes a look "Incredible," he says, "There is a £20 note lodged up here." Tentatively, he eases the twenty out of the man's bottom, only to see another £10 note appear. "This is amazing," exclaims the Doctor, "What do you want me to do?” "Well, for goodness sake, take it out," says Paddy. So the doctor pulls out the tenner and another twenty appears, and another and another and so on... Finally, the last note comes out, and no more appear. "Ah, Doctor, thank ya kindly. That's much better. How much is there?” The Doctor counts the pile of cash. "£1990 exactly.” "Ah, that'd be right," says Paddy, "I knew I wasn't feeling two grand."

Following Monday’s visit by the Reform party and its leader, Nigel Farage, the club would like to issue the following statement: Ipswich Town Football Club has, over several years, hosted representatives from a range of political parties. The club remains apolitical and does not support or endorse any individual or party. The club will continue to engage with representatives from across the political spectrum as part of its role within the community. Ipswich Town is proud to be an inclusive, diverse, and welcoming organisation that supports all members of the local and wider community. This commitment remains unchanged.