Jason

Sorry I haven't been on twitter lately I've been too busy doing this

RIP David Lynch 💜

Sam & Frodo, from The Shire to Mount Doom

Who else is showing Thier parents knocked loose absolutely pissed drunk

The Mary wallopers shouted me out on the live stream because I'm so funny and beautiful

Last night I was visited by 3 ghosts

Me and my friends would have killed Wallace and gromit with hammers I can tell you that much

Up Limerick in the Christmas

Merry Christmas from football head

@inztantcrush Facts

you just can’t go back to boiled carrots after making honey roasted carrots. need my carrots a little burnt and incredibly sweet . please if you want your life to be meaningful make honey roast carrots

There's a fella in the gym wearing jeans and an England jersey

How it feels to have gone to the gym consistently for the last three months while still being an absolute legend in the pub

This is the correct answer

@LaurenHever The feeling of superiority I get when reading in public makes it hard for me to concentrate on the words

@Murfles69 Has to be in public so that the social pressure keeps you in check

Does anyone know how to read a book without falling asleep after three pages

Just saw Liam Neeson in chicken hut

You wish you could do this

It's not even 12PM and this is the best day of my life

@LaurenHever So stacked

@Murfles69 Holy fuck

Spinkicking with tears in my eyes during have a nice life