Progress Oberiko 🇳🇬 🇬🇧

📚 Exciting News! My debut book "Beyond The Usual: Stories & Ideas on How To Maximise Your NYSC Experience" is finally here! 🚀 #BookLaunch Published in 2019, this book explores the transformative impact of NYSC on personal growth, professional development, & community impact.

He might be providing financially, but as a wife, you’ll bear the burden of the family all alone, till it overwhelms you As a wife of such a man, you’re a married single-woman. And as a child of such man, you’ll grow up with two parents, but feel like you grew up with a single-mother. It is very dangerous to be with a man who has such mindset. It is better to be unmarried than to such a man. END.

Totally clueless about things going on in his household. Always reliant on the wife for “updates” and to fill him in with what’s going on in his own children’s lives They blame the wife for anything that goes wrong with the children’s behavior while they completely exonerate themselves from any blames, because after all, they were neither aware nor available. They dodge all accountability.

The worst kind of man to marry is a man who believes that raising the children is a woman’s responsibility. A man who believes that the role of a husband and father is only to provide financially. They’re present but absent fathers to their children. Nonchalant fathers.

So men automatically assume that their wives don’t find other men attractive, their wives have fewer sexual urges, low libido, etc But on the contrary, the same level of self-control required for a woman to stay faithful, is the same level required for a man. It’s self discipline guys!

Men often think cheating and unfaithfulness in marriage is exclusive to them alone, and so there’s such discombobulation when a woman cheats. Talmbout “men are polygamous in nature.” Bro, women are too. But the thing is, the gospel of: - sexual purity - “keep yourself” - fear of God - self-respect - respect for your spouse - self dignity - self-discipline, have mostly been preached to women alone, so there’s a higher expectation for women to be saints.

Men often think cheating and unfaithfulness in marriage is exclusive to them alone, and so there’s such discombobulation when a woman cheats. Talmbout “men are polygamous in nature.” Bro, women are too. But the thing is, the gospel of: - sexual purity - “keep yourself” - fear of God - self-respect - respect for your spouse - self dignity - self-discipline, have mostly been preached to women alone, so there’s a higher expectation for women to be saints. So men automatically assume that their wives don’t find other men attractive, Their wives have fewer sexual urges, low libido, etc But on the contrary, the same level of self-control required for a woman to stay faithful, is the same level required for a man.

It is not just the “I love my husband/wife” that’ll keep you away from cheating when you meet someone you fancy; love alone is never enough. You can love someone and still feel something for someone else. Rather, it is the: - self discipline - fear of God - self respect - respect for your spouse - value for the covenant of marriage That’ll help you stay faithful to your spouse, even in temptation.

I guess my real question is: How do we measure real impact? I mean… Is impact still impact without visibility? I mean… Does visibility always validate impact? I mean… Are you still considered impactful when people don’t seem to give a heck about what you’re sharing? END.

❓Or maybe you’re a content creator filled with wisdom and you always share your wisdom and knowledge publicly, e.g., via social media, etc, would you still be regarded as a ‘Wise Talented Person’ even when barely anyone seemed to have benefited from the wisdom you’re sharing, because you lack visibility?

Is impact still impact when nobody rates your work? Is it still considered impact when you’re putting in the work as a content creator, showing up and posting your content, yet people barely engage with it to get the value of what you’re sharing?

I enjoy cooking, but anything that involves me doing the misé en placé, count me out! That process of prepping the ingredients before cooking: blending pepper, slicing, pounding, etc, and doing all those long preps by myself before officially cooking? count me out. When everything is prepped and ready for cooking, then you can call me into the kitchen to make my magic. I only enjoy cooking when there’s someone around to give me a little helping hand. I genuinely enjoy that company.

Your desperate need to please people does not make you a kind person. You’re just a people pleaser. Work on yourself.

Unpopular opinion: I think one skill you need to learn as an adult is the ability to DISAPPOINT! The ability to say no, when needed. Saying no without hating yourself or feeling like the worst person in the world. No to friends, colleagues, family demands, acquaintances, etc. If you’re always seeking to please people, you might think you’re being nice, but you might just be struggling with people-pleasing. The ability to comfortably say no/disappoint people when needed, is crucial for survival as an adult.

1️⃣6️⃣ Ruth bore Obed, who bore Jesse, who bore King David, and eventually led to the lineage of Jesus. Ruth, a Moabite woman (the same Moabite who served idols), became part of the lineage of Jesus. Because she chose to lead a life of service. Naomi’s God became her God. Lesson—Your background does not limit God's plan for your life. END.

1️⃣5️⃣ “Wash, spray perfume, & dress well” Ruth 3:3 screams intentionally positioning yourself. As someone seeking companionship, you should learn to preparing yourself physically, spiritually, mentally, and emotionally to meet your spouse. Don’t just sit there waiting for someone to find you in a miserable and raggedy state. You have to put in the effort to take care of yourself, go out, dress nice, smell nice, practice good hygiene, build a career, build wealth, serve God, and live life to the fullest even as you expect to meet your spouse. And just like Ruth, nothing stops you from initiating the process if you find someone worthy.

Unpopular biblical opinion: The story of Ruth and Boaz is not a love story as has been popularized.