Jopa's Daughter

Pre-order the Kindle version link is bit.ly/Leavingtoleave £5 – BARCLAYS 20-34-69, 33869946, O.O. AJAI £5 PAYPAL BUNMIAJAI@YAHOO.COM N1750 ZENITH 1004992429, OLUBUNMI AJAI. Please email me at mamatobi@hotmail.com with your confirmation of payment. Thanks.

@Paulsam19 @Onsogbu Igbotic tinz na. Obi- Ike. Gerrit?

@Onsogbu How Emeka IKE added him self to this squad still baffles me

Who add this sound track na

@PatrickObi36272 @Onsogbu Because no be by stupidity na.

@Onsogbu You senior all of them, why didn't you contest under APC?

How ADHD negatively impacted my marriage When we moved into a four-bedroom house, my then husband, Tunde, told me we would no longer be sharing a bed. I begged. Oh, how I begged. He wouldn’t change his mind. I told him separate bedrooms would negatively impact our marriage. When you share a bed with someone, it’s harder to stay angry for long. At that time, we had a passionate marriage. There was no way we could be intimate and still be carrying malice. I’m just not built that way. Some women say they can quarrel with a man, sleep with him, and continue the fight the next day. Not me. Even without sex, I struggle to hold grudges. With intimacy involved? Forget it. I reminded him that whenever we touched, the ice melted. We talked. We resolved things. We moved on. I feared that if we stopped sharing a bed, unresolved issues would start piling up. He didn’t change his mind. Part of my resistance was selfish too. I love cuddles. I love spooning. I love sleeping in the arms of my man. I love playing with the hair on his chest and his beard. I love lazy mornings spent talking sweet nothings in bed, wrapped up in each other’s arms. Given the choice, I’d cuddle to sleep every night rather than sleep alone. I told him all this. He still didn’t change his mind. Then I changed tactics. I started leaving my things in his room. He would move them back to mine. Eventually, I gave up. From then on, whoever wanted intimacy would go to the other person’s room. If it was him, once we were done, he would get up and return to his room no matter how much I begged him to stay. If I went to his room, I would stay the night. And that was the beginning of the schism. Fights took longer to settle. Malice crept in. Resentment built up. The next thing, I was asking for a divorce. He begged and said he’d change. And he changed for a while. The next thing, he moved out. And filed for a divorce. For those wondering, the separate-bedroom issue wasn’t about tidiness. I believe Tunde just used that as an excuse. But if I was not untidy, he would not have had that to use. Tunde wasn’t exactly Mr Neat himself. We were both untidy people. Mine was simply worse. Ironically, Tobi’s dad, Dafe, is extremely neat and organised. He would clean up after me, then beg me to try and keep the house tidy for at least a few days before I scattered everything again. Yet we shared a bedroom throughout our relationship. Looking back, I can see how ADHD affected almost every area of my life negatively. My career. My finances. My impulsive spending. My inability to stick to budgets. And yes, my marriage, in part. So if you’ve been reading my posts and recognising some of these ADHD symptoms in yourself, please seek help. Earlier diagnosis and treatment can save you years of confusion, frustration and self-sabotage. It certainly would have saved me years of heartache. Don’t wait till you are 56, like me. Save yourself years of frustration and loss. And one more thing - I know some couples swear by separate bedrooms and make it work. But if you ask me for advice, I would say don’t do it. Share a bed. Cuddle. Talk sweet nothings before you sleep. Wake up beside each other. Reach out and touch each other in the middle of the night. Some of the most important conversations in a marriage happen in the dark, when there is nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, and the only thing left to do is talk. Maybe separate bedrooms work for some people. But looking back at my own marriage, I still believe that once we stopped sharing a bed, we started growing apart. And when we started growing apart, we lost the will to make the marriage work.

@AishaYesufu Aisha shut up! Shut up! The only value you have is the nuisance one. Goan hide your face in shame.

Ovevekuve! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I hear say one man that did not win primaries in 2022, who even lobbied for running mate and still was not chosen, then ran to do boi boi for a fellow man like him and ended up destroying a party that was once largest in Africa and was recently disgraced by a young military officer is talking about a woman in NDC! Let me wait make the man get liver mention name! Then the man doing boi boi because he has to be in power to have authority will know those of us from Kukuruku empire of Edo State in South South no dey grovel! If dem born Wike well, make e call my name with his full chest! What Tambuwal did him in 2022 will be child’s play! You have been doing politics for donkey years yet you were outplayed so foolishly!

@CruiseCurrentHq A 10 year old has no business being a maid. And a father has a right to want his child back with him. What has a father wanting his child back have to do with her death? Ta! Ketat!

This man narrated what happened to Monique Pearls, the popular TikToker This is such a sad story. How will her one year old son cope 💔

This may be an unpopular opinion, but I will still say it. When two people are in a relationship or marriage, there should be unity and clarity of purpose. One of the most important things there should be clarity about is the issue of children. If one person has made it clear that they do not want children, or do not want more children, then the burden falls primarily on them to make sure no pregnancy occurs. Usually, it is men who say this. They don’t want children or they don’t want more children. In that case, it is extremely risky for a man to leave the responsibility entirely to the woman, especially if the woman wants children. If you know she wants children or more children, then it becomes absolutely VITAL that you take active responsibility for preventing pregnancy. When my mother died and my dad remarried, he married a young lady who had never had children. My dad already had six living children. He told her that he did not particularly want more children, but that he would like to have one child with her so they could have a permanent bond through the child. The lady agreed. First child — my dad was happy. Second child — my dad was less happy, but he accepted it. At that point, I told him he was being selfish. He already had six children and expected a woman who had never had children before to stop at one? I told him plainly that he needed to get the snip because he should NEVER rely on a woman who wants more children to be the sole person responsible for making sure there are no more children. My dad looked at me like, ‘Is this one my child?’ The kind of relationship my dad fostered with us his children was one which we could tell him he was wrong if we believed he was. If we came with superior arguments, he would agree with us and go with what we advocated. On this one, he did not agree with me to have a snip. I told him that if he refused to get the snip and she got pregnant again, I would support her. Well… she got pregnant again. Lol. She was so afraid of telling my dad that she waited until she was four months pregnant before she finally told him. At the time, my dad was on holiday with me in London. Let’s just say he was not impressed. His finances was severely damaged by having to care and train for 3 little kids. Because by this time, my mother’s children were all grown up. Imagine starting a second round of training children in his 60s. So, dear men, if you know for sure that you do not want children, or do not want more children, DO NOT leave the responsibility of preventing pregnancy entirely to a woman who clearly wants children. On my next post, I will talk to women who knowingly get pregnant after a man has clearly said he does not want more children. JOPA and his daughter. lol. I love my dad - even in death. If there is a coming back to life again, I will choose JOPA to be my father all over again.

@DRealBabyface @SAsekome @officialABAT @ebenezerbablola @woye1 @WOkene @BayoAdedosu @UthmanIsiaq1 @salawueedris1 @Gen_Buhar @DOlusegun @Ade_Nurayn @aonanuga1956 No man made system is perfect. Hopefully, things will be fine tuned and will get better.

@SAsekome @officialABAT @ebenezerbablola @woye1 @WOkene @BayoAdedosu @UthmanIsiaq1 @salawueedris1 @Gen_Buhar @DOlusegun @Ade_Nurayn @aonanuga1956 Sadly, we have seen candidates whom the direct primaries clearly favored, individuals genuinely loved and chosen by the people only for their victories to be taken away by certain elements and handed over to someone else.

President @officialABAT pleaded with these people to wet the grassroots, but they all formed deaf ears. Now they're crying after being rejected by the same people they failed, while they enjoy the lavish lifestyles with their families in Abuja🤦🏾‍♂️ If Allah spares our lives, in the next 4yrs, we will begin to see politicians competing to be the best performing in thier communities. 📌Governors will now sit up more to their core mandates and responsibilities to their states and we will begin to see more visible developments across the states. 📌Senators will focus more on their Senatorial Districts. And for the first time, the people will know what "Constituency Projects" truly means😅 📌HoR members will do more for their Constituencies. 📌Local Government Chairman will ensure they work harder. 📌Even the councillors will go over and beyond to serve the people. 📌And for the very first time in the history of this country, the grassroots will feel the positive impacts of governance and see those who represent them in Abuja visit them more in their villages😁 This is the vision President Tinubu is driving with the introduction of the Direct Primaries into our political landscape! THE ENTIRE FOCUS IS THE GRASSROOTS!🔥

@SAsekome @officialABAT @ebenezerbablola @woye1 @WOkene @BayoAdedosu @UthmanIsiaq1 @salawueedris1 @Gen_Buhar @DOlusegun @Ade_Nurayn @aonanuga1956 Visionary.

Life lessons from my 22 year old son. I told Tobi he was free to bring his love interests home. So, one day, he brought home a Pakistani girl. I had already warned Tobi to be careful about dating from very conservative Muslim backgrounds — especially where ‘honour killings’ are still a real thing. At first, he thought I was being racist until I explained that this is not about race, but culture and family expectations. Tobi is neither Muslim nor Asian. That combination can become dangerous for young women from certain backgrounds if families disapprove. He understood eventually, but told me, ‘Mum, I’m only 22. I’m not thinking of marriage yet.’ Fair enough. Anyway… this girl? Oh Emm Gee. This lady was EXQUISITELY beautiful. With very little makeup and gorgeous hair. Instantly, I started imagining the gorgeous Blasian grandchildren she and Tobi would give me. Then they broke up shortly after. Me: 😭😭😭 Tobi refused to tell me why because this boy is a closed book. Fast forward to two days ago. We were using his phone for something and I saw a notification from her. I became excited immediately, thinking they had reunited. ‘No,’ said Tobi. ‘We are not back together.’ I disturbed this boy until he FINALLY explained what happened. Apparently, she had told him she was getting back with her ex. ‘Ok. Bye. Take care and have a great life,’ said my son. A short while later, she returned and said she had realised it was actually Tobi she wanted, not the ex. My son said no. He told her, ‘I’m not the option you come back to after the person you really wanted lets you down. Please go back to him or move on to someone else. Not me.’ Since then, this girl has been calling and messaging him nonstop. Tobi kept saying politely, ‘Please stop. I’m not interested.’ She kept apologising and begging for another chance. Finally, Tobi told her, ‘If you don’t stop, I will block you.’ She didn’t stop. So he blocked her. Then she moved to his social media and started messaging him there. That was when my son said something that even made ME pause: ‘Please have some self respect. If someone blocks you on one channel, don’t go to another one to contact them. If they want you in their life, they won’t block you. They’ll work with you to fix things.’ Honestly, I agreed with him. But at the same time… I felt sorry for the girl. She is only 18. Eighteen-year-olds are emotional and impulsive. And she really was respectful and lovely with me. Plus… the grandchildren in my imagination were already so fine! So now I am torn. Should I encourage Tobi to forgive her and give her another chance because she is young and made a mistake? Or should I support his position that nobody deserves to be treated like a backup option after Plan A fails? What say you, Tobi’s online Aunties and Uncles?

@idofoi So, she was not in a party when she refused to stand. Stupid girl. Tinubu’s anthem? Not national anthem? So, now it is no longer Tinubu’s anthem? Foolish thing.

These are the kind of people we share a country with, people who want to go to the Senate. Aisha Yusufu knew it was wrong not to stand for the national anthem, yet she still refused. But now that Aisha Yusufu wants to run for election in 2027, she has suddenly started standing for the anthem. People like her can not be trusted to represent anyone.

@TheGrandmaBoy Awon developers.

BREAKING NEWS: Nigerian Police reject N500 Million bribe and Arrest Eke Henry Ifeanyi with 425 Bags of Suspected Illicit drugs Worth N7.8B Lagos, Nigeria Operatives of the Nigeria Police Force Zone 2 Command have arrested Eke Henry Ifeanyi, a 41-year-old suspected drug kingpin, in a major raid Drug Kingpin raid that uncovered 425 bags of substances suspected to be Canadian Loud, a potent strain of cannabis valued in the billions of naira. The operation, which followed intelligence from a concerned citizen and months of surveillance, took place at Ifeanyi’s three-bedroom apartment and warehouse located at 10, Olori Adekemi Ajibola Street, Arowojobe Estate, Mende, Maryland, Lagos. Police recovered the large consignment of illicit drugs along with vehicles fitted with forged “presidency” and National Youth Council of Nigeria (NYCN) number plates, which the suspect allegedly used to move the substances undetected. Citizens must report any suspicious activities in their surroundings to The police

I say I will be the kind of side chic that will make your husband happy and that will translate to a happy marriage. I say I will make sure he does not have any other side chics and that he concentrates on just you and me. I say that I will not tell you to get up from your throne, that I will just perch with one yansh. And you all are telling me to sponsor soft geh life for you? You are not ready o. For clarification, I am NOT going to do side chic for a broke arse married man!!!! Infidelity is not cheap! If your husband can’t afford to keep you and me in soft geh life, do NOT distop me! God forbid I do side chic for a broke man. Eleda mi ko. My creator rejects that. If your husband is rich and generous and needs a side chic and you want a side chic that understands the assignment and is not a threat to you, ehn. Let’s talk. If you are a rich man that loves his wife but wants an exciting and sexy mature woman who will not disturb your wife, tell your wife to apply for you. If you no get money, hide your face.

Just thinking… if I decide to become your husband’s side chic, ah! You will gbadun mi. You will enjoy me. I will make sure that he has no other side chics that will take his attention away from you and me. I wee make sure that he does not spend money on anyone else apart from you and me. I wee make sure that he does not step out apart from with you and me. Ah. You will enjoy me as your husband’s side chic, yasin. Because I will not disturb you. I will not tell you to get up from your throne. I wee perch by the side with one yansh. I may not be a good wife o, but ayam a great gehfren. I know my wife material is like 2 yards. But my gehfren material? In the millions of yards. I wee make ur husband happy and a happy husband is a happy home. You want to try me and let me side chic your husband?

They would advise him: ‘Buy your wife something nice, dalinmi.’ ‘Spend more time with your children switat.’ ‘Don’t forget her birthday, maidia.’ Relationship consultants in the shadows. They were not threats to the marriage. They were unpaid marital support staff. Honestly, I think this level of side chic contentment mostly comes from women who have already been married, survived the in-laws, and have absolutely no desire to do wifey tinz again. At that stage, girlfriend package can look very attractive. Less stress. More enjoyment. No in law battles. Just collect your portion and face front

Happy Side Chic story. My parents both worked at the Nigerian Ports Authority (NPA), but in different ports. My mum was permanently at Tin Can, while my dad, being in the core Traffic department, was moved around constantly to different ports as Traffic Manager and later, Port Manager. Now, this story is about one of my mum’s office aburos. Let’s call her ‘Aunty Kike.’ Everybody — and I mean everybody — knew that Aunty Kike and one manager, let’s call him Mr Adesanya, were doing tatatata together. This was not a hidden affair. No undercover operation. No coded language. It was public knowledge before social media could even trend it. They were lovers until Mr Adesanya died. I am talking about decades o. Aunty Kike was a divorcee with two children. Marriage? She had already done that and gotten the Tshirt. She was not interested in marriage round two. Mr Adesanya, on the other hand, was also not trying to upset the apple cart at home. So both of them simply minded their business and carried on for decades. I’m very sure Mrs Adesanya knew. How could she not know? This was not ‘secret relationship.’ This was ‘everybody in the office knows but let us all behave maturely.’ And Aunty Kike was not trying to become Mrs Adesanya. God forbid stress. She only wanted the premium package — the soft life parts of Mr Adesanya. Let Madam keep the full subscription with responsibilities, in law issues, and probably his snoring and bad morning breath. Then Mr Adesanya died. Aunty Kike, being a respectful veteran in the game, asked Mrs Adesanya if she could attend the funeral. Mrs Adesanya said yes. As a guest o. Let us not get confused. And so Aunty Kike attended her lover’s funeral, paid her respects, got closure, and went home. No scene. No chest beating. Just class. Now, another story. I had an older friend — more like an aunt, but one of those cool aunties who gist with you like age is just a suggestion. Let’s call her Aunty Bisi. Her husband did premium wickedness. Chased her out, kept the children, and basically said, ‘Vaya con Dios.’ Meanwhile, when she married him, he had told her to stop working. She had been working at Barclays Bank back when Barclays existed in Nigeria before Obasanjo’s nationalisation era. Yes, Indomi peepus, Union Bank was once Barclays. That horse logo is not there for decoration. Anyway, after turning her into a full-time SATM for over 12 years, giving birth to four children, this husband suddenly reset her life. She had met him as an innocent 18-year-old. By the time Oga finished with her, she was in her 30s, starting life from scratch with small work experience and big lessons. Thankfully, her old Barclays experience helped her get back into banking. This woman climbed from cashier to manager in over 15+ years. Proper comeback story. But here’s the kicker… For all those years, Aunty Bisi was also faithfully side chicking one senior manager-turned-director. Let’s call him Mr Adekunle. Mr Adekunle did not want another wife. Aunty Bisi did not want another husband. Perfect agreement. No pressure. No bridal shower. No ‘when are we meeting your people?’ Or ‘where is this relationship going?’ Just vibes, companionship, and likely good restaurants. And as far as I know, till Aunty Bisi passed, she and Mr Adekunle were still in their peaceful arrangement. See, these were side chics who understood the assignment. They were not trying to snatch anybody’s husband. They were not fighting to become Madam. They had already done marriage, seen shege, collected their certificate, and respectfully retired. They simply wanted the best bits: Dates. Attention. Soft life. Emotional support. Maybe small getaway. Without somebody demanding that you go and grovel to their mother even though it was the mother that fucked up. Or someone telling you can’t get up and do what you want to do to better your life. In fact, some of these women even helped these men become better husbands. Yes o.

@officialginika Welcome!

@OlaChronicles I am finally here.

That side chic that I told you is lucky? The one wey her ori and her agreed when she was coming to the earth that dem go dey kolabo like joint venture partners? Yes. This gist is about her friend. So, let us call this side chic Seyi. Seyi was side chic-ing one rich Chief Lagbaja whom we shall call Tony. Old family money. On top of that, he has his own money. Tony had been married for 30+ years. No children. Refused testing. Refused adoption. Refused medical intervention. Just wickedly sitting there, letting the wife carry the blame as they do. Meanwhile, Shif get wetinkol Azoospermia. As in no spamatozoa kankan. Empty bullets fired only. Then BAM! Seyi announces pregnancy. Tony starts doing proud father upandan. Massive naming ceremony. Spraying money because money na water. Because now, it has ‘confirmed’ to the whole world that the wife was the problem all along. The funniest part? Seyi thinks she don scam Tony successfully. She thinks baba genuinely believes the baby is his. Sis does not know Tony KNOWS that child is not his but is accepting this child to save himself from societal humiliation and stigma. He pushed the humiliation and stigma to his wife. He already knew he was shooting blanks from way back But Tony no send that the child Issa baxtid. And Seyi? If you see how this whole Chief Lagbaja shakes and cries for her ehn? You go think say dem jazz am. She talks to him anyhow. Collects money anyhow. Disrespects him anyhow. Baba go dey cry and beg his friends to help him beg her. Ah. Wora piri. In Nollywood, this is where thunder would faya the side chic’s yansh and the wife at home would be vindicated. Lmao. Nothing happened. The wife died childless while everybody still believed she was the barren one. And the last I heard o, Tony still dey shake for Seyi. And Seyi still treats him anyhowly.

@HighChiefOkoro @OkoyeChivita But is there any reason why they don’t build house and develop their own regions? Is there region allergic to being developed?

Peter Obi said the Igbos are more superior than other tribes in Nigeria. He doesn’t even see every Nigerian as equal, yet he wants to fool some persons to get their votes. “Na we be Nigeria pass”.

@LegendaryJoe Sorry… erase indigenship. Let him open the country for the whole world to become citizens then since we won’t have indigenous people anymore.

@LegendaryJoe Very pedestrian. Sigh. Talk about the economy. No. Shebi you claim to be hungry? On Maslow’s pyramid, food comes first. You have not said how you will sort out basic needs, you are talking of erasing citizenship. Why not kuku open our doors to the world as we no get citizenship

I WILL CANCEL INDIGENESHIP IN NIGERIA - WE ARE ALL ONE In fairness to the former Governor of Rivers State and two-time Minister, he is not the first to walk this hypocritical path. He is not the pioneer of this peculiar tradition - where men who seek our votes suddenly discover that the antidote to Nigeria's afflictions is for the people to forget their roots, bury their ancestry, and perish their origin at the altar of nationality. There have been others. Including our own very son - the former Vice-President - who also parroted that shallow, empty, and thoroughly mundane theory: "I will cancel State of Origin." The same man who, when he aspired to lead this nation, thought it was politically creative to make a public spectacle of visiting the sleeping site of our Revered Prime Minister, Tafawa Balewa. Awolowo still lay peacefully in Ikenne. Our brother did not consider him worthy of such theatre. Because Ikenne would have been too Yoruba. And he was busy performing Nigeria. And while he was busy visiting the honoured dead, he forgot the living in his own homestead - Ikenne Remo. My own very town. Not a studio apartment in his name. Not a road paved to the family house. Not a hospital. Not a school. Nothing. He despised the memory of our dead patriots and showed contempt for his living kinsmen in the same breath. Little wonder his most memorable policy declaration as the number two citizen was the abolition of the people's origins. Eight years of the Yoruba slot in government - a total waste to his heritage. Shall I Begin? Now these men owe us something before the rhetoric continues. They owe us data. Statistics. Peer-reviewed studies. Empirical evidence. How precisely does the removal of indigeneship cure our corruption? How does it fix our infrastructure? Neutralise our security menace? Absorb our unemployed millions? Rhetoric is not an answer. Confusion dressed in a suit is not a policy. Vacuous propaganda is not governance - and it is always promoted most loudly by those who have no better alternative to the status quo. Then Rotimi Amaechi took it a notch higher, proposing the removal of Federal Character from our constitution entirely. Let us reason together. Is Rotimi suggesting that all 36 states of this federation will one day have governors of Northern extraction? All of them? That the entire cabinet of the Presidency will be Yoruba? That an Emeka will one day be Alaafin of Oyo, and a Babajide become Sultan of Sokoto? That the President and his Vice will be a Chidi and Ngozi - and all the Principal Officers of the National Assembly hail from Ogbomoso? Or is he proposing, while he is at it, that we eradicate the languages too? The dialects? The indigenous names carried from generation to generation? Let him say so plainly. Even God is the Lion of the Tribe of Judah, not of Egba or Kanuri - The Almighty recognized tribal identity. Even in heaven, there are tribes. Our leaders must abandon these pedestrian, populist theatrics and bring us practical, realistic, intelligent medicine for this country's ailments - or vacate the stage for the men and women who actually possess the brains for nation-building. The polity has no more patience for mundane rants dressed as vision. Identity is not the enemy of unity. Amnesia is not nation-building. And a man who cannot celebrate where he is from cannot be trusted to build anywhere worth going. Let me hang it here for now - Is this my most brutal article yet? Good Morning, Severally.