Paula Chang

I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home. So I threw him out. I hate visitors.

Finally. Late is better than never. #TrumpBanned

Is the election over yet? Is 2020 over yet? Is any of it over?

Finally some good news this year! I’m ready to hug everyone but you know, COVID.

If you’re in a 500-person conga line screaming in victory with honking traffic, STAY IN LINE

@heyitsheli about damn time!

🔥🔥🔥

Upgrade!!

Why do you capitalize only the first words of sentences?

Sunglasses, mask, hat, and headphones: in what order does one remove these items from the head in a way that is not regrettable?

Best thing I’ve heard all year. #TrumpHasCovid

A weekend with rearranged furniture made me feel like I was at an Airbnb. #QuarantineLife

@girlonthem00n Yikes!

@paula To add to that, there was a fire tornado warning in Lassen county yesterday. 😬🌪️🔥

Virus. Wildfires. Power outages. California is just a drought and earthquake away from an apocalypse.

At this point, anyone is better. I’d vote for a potato.

Everyday is Wednesday.

Can we all agree to not age this year and that 2020 is just a blip in the space time continuum?

Dear Paulas: You can’t have my Twitter handle. (Unless you have lots of money. Then we should talk.)

@KristyT @tedgetten I might have to stop by in the morning to see some of the reactions!

@kerem @KristyT Can’t attach anything to the wall... but that *would* be pretty cool!

@KristyT @paula Also please tell me you guys are hooking lights behind the sign 😬😬 this is gonna look epic.

@kerem @KristyT No way. @KristyT is the bestest.

@KristyT Oh la la 👌 @Paula is the best.